Cliffhanger

The Expendables: Day 3

STALLONE!  What I love about Stallone is how effing old he is. He is 64 and still writing, directing, and acting in really good movies. Sly is also the sequel king of Hollywood. Think about how many sequels he has done. Rambo and Rocky have 9 sequels between them once Rambo 5 gets released next year. Maybe he will play Gabe Walker one more time. I can't think of a single reason not to. I hope I look that good when I'm old as shit. I Better start the steroids now. (Jason Statham may catch him and pass him as the sequel king,  but we'll get into that tomorrow.)  It feels really natural for me to write about Cliffhanger. For a couple reasons, A: It's Awesome, B: It's Violent, and C: It was the first rated R movie I ever saw in the theater. My Dad took me and my younger brother to see it when my mother was out of town. I think he did this so she couldn't stop him. I was 11 and Mitch was 8. Mom was not happy, but we were extremely happy with what we got to see. Opening scenes don't make or break any movie, but there is something to be said when the opening scene lives on as one of the greatest, first ten minutes of any movie ever. It's at least in the top 5 greatest opening scenes. Dropping his best friends chic 8000 feet! SPLAT! Sucks to be her, and apparently Gabe took it pretty hard himself. He held himself responsible, his friend now hates him, and he gave up what he loved because of the guilt. Then after months of being reclused wherever he was, he came back to get some shit he left behind, only to be thrust back onto a mountain. Cliffhanger had awesome action and new great ways to kill bad people. The one liners were good and John Lithgow couldn't be better. Basically, the whole mountain gets taken hostage by Lithgow and his evil crew of money stealing baddies, including a dirty FBI agent. They have stolen Several million dollars, but transport did not go to plan. Now their future retirement is lost in the cold ass mountains and they need skilled climbers to retrieve it . After several one on one battles with the baddies, Gabe ultimately endures. He kills a guy on a stalactite, shot a guy with a gun that sets hooks in the rocky mountain side, he burned up at least 1 million dollars to stay warm. He then had to battle Lithgow which resulted in more millions being diced in the propeller of the helicopter. Explosions, night vision, and rabbits were all present in this adrenaline rush feature that I watched for the 400th time about a month ago. He also had time to build a really cool snowman, and they got hit by bats exiting a cave. He also burned a guys face in the snow while sliding down the side of a cliff. As you can tell, it is full of a lot of awesome scenes, that are always enjoyable to watch, any time of day, week, or year. Plus, Lithgow is so hardcore he kills his lover, so he will be the only pilot, therefore making himself Inexpendable. (You love that connection, don't you?) Brutal asshole, but played to perfection. I love this movie and maybe it will be my sons first R rated movie. One can only hope his mother goes out of town, so me and him can share that spectacular opening scene together.

On a side note. Rumors of a Cliffhanger 2 is all over the web, and no matter how bad it may look, I will be there.

NBM rates Cliffhanger as - Awesome

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