17 Again

Switch-a-roo movies are a dime a dozen, and the one thing they all have in common is their lack of imagination. This one was at least fun to watch, but I do think it would be more enjoyable for the few people that actually enjoyed High School. Mike (Perry) is having mid life decision regrets about the path he took in High School. His marriage is falling apart and his wife is the "decision" he is now regretting. He has a son and daughter in high school that he doesn't understand, when he gets a second shot at life. **Poof** Mike is now 17 Again. He has now got to figure out how to blend. He changes his name to Mark [clever] and he moves in with his best friend who pretends to be his Dad. He enrolls in the high school and joins the Basketball team where he becomes the star...again. This time he is not going to squander his opportunity for a girl-even though his soon to be ex wife is always in his thoughts. The return to high school gives him insight into his kids lives and he tries to council them as their friend since they wouldn't listen to him as their Father. He is king once again and he likes it. He really grows with his son, but his daughter is more on the hate side with him. He tries to break her and her bf up, and she is not receptive to say the least. What sets this film apart from the other ones with similar premis' is the cougar/youngan relationship. Mike, now Mark, reminds her of her high school sweetheart/ soon to be ex husband as he should. He sweet talks her and their relationship builds to a point of no return, but she knows she cannot be with a 17 year old. She is suspicious of this new boy and the absence of Mike, but the realm of possibility keeps her thinking it's just coincidence. He does stay on course with his basketball mulligan dreams because he feels he will not return to adult form without re-growing up. This was a really good movie about a mature mind being in the body of his 17 year old self and the decisions he must make for himself and his family. What direction will he go in round 2? This movie surprised me with it's cleverness. Plus Zac Effron is kind of dreamy.


NBM rates 17 Again - Awesome

All Good Things

This film is about the true crime that rocked New York back in the 1980's only to be re hatched in 2000. This very very indie film stars Ryan Gosling and Kirsten Dunst as the happy couple. Gosling is David Marks who's Father, Sanford (Langella), is involved in some sort of shady money laundering or slum lording, but it's never actually clear to us what it is. He feels David should go into the family business, but David does not want to. He meets Kate (Dunst) and they get married, move to the country, and open a store called All Good Things. They seem happy, but the pressure Sanford puts on his son to move back is overwhelming and so it begins. The film follows David from 1971-2003 and although it moves smoothly, I feel the details were lacking in some degrees. Being a true crime suspense film, I expected more. I enjoyed it, but it could have done a better job. Once David is working for his Father, his marriage seems to crack. He begins to crack. He is irrational and easily angered. He takes his frustration out on Kate, but no one ever intervenes. Then she has had enough. She tries to get divorced, but that doesn't go over at all. She then tries a blackmail route, but to no avail. Then she just disappears. The film follows their lives up to that point, then it skips to the year 2000 when David goes to extreme measures to hide from his past. I didn't mind the film, I just wished it had more greatness. The acting was superb and Gosling really plays creepy well. 

NBM rates All Good Things - Great

Sideways

Having gone to a local winery yesterday, I feel obligated to write about that topic. Not many movies are based on the subject of wine. I can think of two. Sideways and Bottleshock. Having only seen this one, it is gonna be the one you hear about...from me anyway. This is one of the most brilliantly written films I remember seeing at the time I watched it. This "Independent" film follows two best friends, Milo (Giamatti) and Jack (Thomas Haden Church), on a road trip to wine country, California. Jack is a week away from being married and this is his bachelor party/getaway. Milo is a wine connoisseur of sorts. He loves it. The taste, the smell, the knowledge of it all. He is also very good at it. His friend, Jack, on the other hand could care less than anything other than how drunk it can get him. They have their adventure, but the two of them lead very different lives. Milo has very little in his life and he has to work is ass for that. Jack does not care about anyone but himself and he lands a wealthy fiance' that will take care of all his problems. Milo has a book deal in the works that he is banking on to get him out of his crappy life and hopefully thrust him into the next phase of his life. What happens on this trip is both funny, tragic, and scummy. Jack figures he has it made, so what the hell? He does what he wants and by "what", I mean Sandra Oh. He has a fling with her which results in him getting his butt kicked. It also leads the Milo's misery being magnifies exponentially. He also met someone on this trip and he feels she could be very long term. Unfortunately she is best friends with the Sandra Oh character and when she finds out Jack is to be wed, she will have nothing to do with Milo any longer. Milo feels he needs Jack for whatever reason, but in fact, if he cut ties he would probably be better off. He won't and this leads to the funniest staged car wreck scene of all time. This film also delivers one of the grossest scenes I have ever witnessed [Pictured above.] If you've seen it, you know. If not, then watch and you will then know. I do love this movie about friendship, love, and the American dream. Sideways also gave us the performance by Paul Giamatti that would give him A list status. Without Sideways we wouldn't have Lady in the Water, or John Adams. 

NBM rates Sideways - Phenomenal

The Hangover Part II

My standing on this film as both a sequel and its own piece of performance art will be very clear to you in a few sentences. It is being dumped on by the media, whereas the first film was hailed "Brilliant", this one being deemed a waste of time and pointless. "We already saw this film 2 years ago" someone said. I say that is malarkey. You read right. MALARKEY!!!! Of course it is the same. Are we as audiences stupid? I say Nay! We knew what we were in for, and in my opinion it delivered perfectly. We knew the players and the game. What we did not know were the details from point A to point B. It does as brilliant a job of painting the scene as the first one did. The direction is very similar in the fact that we don't get to experience the night first hand, but through a series of clues our imaginations are able to run rampant. The dialog and jokes are just as good as 1, and they are fresh with several call backs that I thoroughly enjoyed. Once again Alan steals the show with his child like attitude and thought process. By misunderstanding or mishearing he causes more mayhem for the boys of summer. Stu is about to get married. Not to Heather Graham unfortunately, but to a beautiful Thai woman he believes to be his soul mate. He and "White" Doug, along with Phil and Alan travel to a beautiful resort in Thailand (pronounced Thy-land) for the wedding and then it happens again. They wake up in a seedy, dank hotel in Bangkok with no recollection of how they got there. The biggest problem with this is the person they are missing this time. The future brides 16 year old brother. He is the pride and joy of their Father, who happens to hate Stu before this even happens. They have 2 days to figure it out, find him, and get back for the nuptials. He knows he cannot go back without him and thus the new adventure begins. The visuals are a little better than the first one because of the setting. Bangkok instead of Vegas is a drastic difference. A smoking, dealing monkey instead of a tiger and so on. The biggest issue they have is figuring out how they ended up in this situation again, considering the bachelor party entailed 5 guys splitting a single 6 pack of Budweiser on the beach. I would have liked to see Doug involved in the shenanigans, but alas he was wiser than the others. Leslie Chow shows back up and is brilliant as the Asian gangster once again. They were about 3 scenes that had me rolling, and another 3 that had me shocked [in a great way]. The entire movie movies quickly and the soundtrack is done well, which is pretty usual for Todd Phillips films. Stu has another original tune, and the credits are better than the first film. If you are offended easily or you thought the first Hangover was right on the line, then this film is not for you. It takes that line and sets it on fire with boundary pushing vengeance and furious Humor. I rated the first the HIGHEST rating we use for it's originality, but for this sequel that is so much fun, but with little "new" aspects...

NBM rates The Hangover Part II - Phenomenal

The Devil Wears Prada

This was one of those movies that just flat out does not appeal to men. It is about a Hellish female boss who makes the lives of her subordinates miserable. It's also about the fashion industry. That's 0-2. Luckily it delivers Meryl Streep, Anne Hathaway, and Simon Baker making it 3-2 in terms of male watchability. The performances are something to behold. It follows the business of Miranda Priestly (Streep) and how everything from the magazine layout to the right amount of cream in her morning latte better be effing perfect or she will have your ass. Having loved Meryl for so long and watched her be nothing but sweet in most all of her roles, this was a huge change for her. She did phenomenal. Her attitude if you messed up on a different number of levels was always the same. She will ridicule you, demean you, make you want to not exist, but mostly with a very seemingly calm attitude. When Andy (Hathaway) scores what most would deem a "dream job" being Miranda's personal assisstant she does not know what is in store. Unfortunately for her, the job's turnover rate is extremely high due to how the boss treats her help. Andy is not in love with the fashion world, she merely needs a job. She is smart, but she has no self esteem. She will not let Miranda beat her. When she first shows up at the office of this fashion magazine with her frizzy hair, baggy clothes, and ten dollar sneakers, she is given a quick negative review by the boss and immediately begins conforming the best she can. She is slighted by other co-workers because she did get the job without knowing or caring who she was working for. It doesn't take long for Andy to completely delve herself into this new glitz and glam world of fashion and travel. The whole movie is very, I'll call it Dark Humor. It makes you feel sorry for Andy, but at the same time, it makes us feel like, Why would anyone put up with that? Turns out Andy is able to give Miranda the fight no one has ever been able to, but when Andy takes a step back and looks at what she is becoming, it really makes her ponder if this is the person she wants to be. It is a very good movie, with the best sarcasm ever. Stanly Tucci also delivers a fine performance as he always does.

NBM rates The Devil Wears Prada - Awesome

State of Play

We have come to the end of "Superior Sequels week", but I may begin inferior sequels week after I watch the Hangover part II. It is much easier to find sequels that don't measure up to the first installment of any franchise. Tonight's review has nothing to do with any of that. I actually watched this last night and the main reason wasn't the story, or the abundance of positive reviews, but merely the cast.  A-List heavy that includes the 2 men above plus Helen Mirren (Oooh yeeeeeah), Rachel McAdams, Robin Wright Penn, and Jeff Daniels. I knew little about this except that it involved a reporter, a strange death, and a Congressman, but I wasn't sure of any more details than that. The reason I didn't was because it being classified as a thriller, it was good marketing to keep certain secrets. From minute 1 I was entralled. It takes about 15 minutes to get into the death, but we learn about Cal McCaffrey (Crowe) and his characters attributes during the opening credits. He is a journalist and a damn good one. His "best" friend is Rep. Stephen Collins (Affleck), and the story really kicks off when Collins lead researcher is killed/commits suicide. This immediately leads to a scandal that will cripple Stephens investigation into a company that provides privatized security by ex military/mercenaries. He wants to shut them down, but they don't want to be shut down. The film jumps from theory to theory from the journalistic point of view. A solid investigation by the reporters and the cops with help from the government turns this movie into a fun think piece for the audience. We are constantly wondering what is really going on and who is guilty? This film takes the mystery down to the final 5 minutes and is laced with action and mayhem throughout. This film was so much better than I could have expected. If you have any inclination to watch this, do it. You will not be disappointed. As a thriller it succeeds. As for Ben Affleck, this was one of my favorite performances of his in God knows how long. He is fantastic.

NBM rates State of Play - Awesome 

Toy Story 2

DON'T TALK TO ANY TOY YOU DON'T KNOW!!

With Kung Fu Panda 2 coming out and the fact that it is animated and getting great preliminary reviews, I thought I would go back to the cartoon franchise that started it all. The digital age of computer generated toons began with Toy Story in 1995, but in 1999 Toy Story 2 gave us a story of loyalty, respect, and freedom of choice. It's funny to me that as kids, Woody is our Hero, but as adults, when we dissect it, he is a bit of a selfish punk in every film. Buzz is the real man of the series. His loyalty to Woody is above reproach. When Woody is "toynapped" by Al - of Al's Toy Barn - he is hot on the trail. I also like Buzz's sunny disposition. He is strapped to a rocket in 1, imprisoned by another Buzz in 2, and turned into factory setting Buzz followed by Spanish Buzz in 3, yet he is always okay with everything. Woody, however, is always so right about everything and he makes his decisions based on him...nothing else. The cast is all back and the jokes and tributes are better than ever. Star Wars to Jurassic Park. It never gets old. The film is about getting Woody back to Andy before he gets home from Cowboy Camp, yet Woody is all geared up to go to Japan with the rest of his "Roundup Gang". We meet Jessie, Bullseye, and Stinky Pete. They were all characters in a marionette puppet show in the '50's. He and his gang are worth a lot of money to a toy museum in Japan and he doesn't want to abandon his new friends to a life of storage, yet his real friends come calling and he finds it hard to deny his instincts. The final 20 minutes are very intense...not like TS 3 intense, but still. This movie is better than its predecessor, though Toy Story is as good as it can get, this one peaks it by just so much in the term of depth of story and emotion. Plus when Woody gets cleaned and refurbished, that is one of the most fun scenes I have ever seen. Just to watch the rejuvenation is invigorating to me.

NBM rates Toy Story 2 - A Work of Cinematic Art

Clerks II

Clerks was what it was. A new look from a new director Kevin Smith. A black and white film that follows Dante on his day off, even though he ends up working which in turn ends up being the worst day imaginable. Due to the is bad day we hear the quote every 5 minutes come from his mouth, "I'm not even supposed to be here." I enjoyed it, but I do think it got more recognition and praise than it deserved. Clerks 2 however is funnier, dirtier, and at times, sexier. Once again Dante and his BFF Randal are working crap jobs at a fast food joint. It is Dante's last week as he is to wed a woman with money who is way out of his league. This leads Randal to make sure he gets a proper send off....donkey show and all. The jokes are so brilliant and so raunchy, I really am surprised this film hasn't reached a cult status of sorts. Jason Lee makes an appearance as does Ben Affleck, and Jay and Silent Bob do what they do best, which is not much. They are slacker loiterers making money any way they can, but when Jay does the "Buffalo Bill" dance, I lost it. Didn't see that coming at all. Dante is ready to start his new life, but one thing - Person - is making him think twice. His boss, Becky (The insatiably sexy Rosario Dawson). They have deep conversations about life, love, the future, and the often overlooked topic of "ass to mouth". Faux paux or okay? He has to make a decision that will ultimately sculp the rest of his life. Stay and be miserable, or leave and eventually be miserable. That's just Dante's mentality and reality. He cannot escape it, becomes he is the problem. I like the movie so much better than the original and I do think the general consensus is the same among most people.

NBM rates Clerks II - Awesome

The Dark Knight

This weekend the only two new releases anyone cares about are The Hangover Part II and Kung Fu Panda 2. Hmmmm. 2 sequels that have amazing beginning stories. This is a nerve racking weekend for people like me. Purists. Sometimes things should just be put to bed. Can they get any better? That's is a tough question, and I feel the percentage of a sequel being better than the original is probably got about a 3% success rate in the history of film. Not many can add up to the time and devotion a first film has on it's side. Let's face it. Sequels are made to make money. Bottom line. The End. The commercial success of a film will have a sequel in the works after the opening weekend if the numbers are right. Sequels, for the most part, are good, but not great, or spectacular. I have compiled a list of sequels unanimous with being better. I think with as poor as DC Comics does with it's films (Green Lantern is not looking so great either) , I should shine some light on the best they have done with the re-booted Batman franchise. Granted, it is only great because of the writer and Director. Nolan is brilliant. The best Director in Hollywood today? YES, YES, YES!!!! To take this once successful franchise and start over essentially removing the "comic book" feel of it all takes balls. Batman Begins was a work of art in and of itself, but by waiting till the sequel to bring one of the most iconic villains of all time back to the big screen, that's just patience. The Joker made this film what it was, and even if Ledger hadn't died (shame), it still would have gotten the recognition it did. Why So Serious? Brilliant. Replacing Holmes with Gyllenhaal was perfect, and Eckart as Harvey Dent was also perfect. The Two-Face CG was unlike anything I have ever seen, but the mayhem the The Joker caused is what this film was all about. He was written as a sociopath and Ledger played it to perfection. Oscar deserved. The way he is constantly tasting and embracing his mouth scars is a work of genius. I was so creeped out by him, yet I didn't want it to end, or did I? This is a great film with action, love, loss, and the choosing of sides. I also think this could be the first franchise in history where the 3rd film will actually be better than the previous two. The Dark Knight Rises is set for next summer and I cannot wait. I posted the first released pic form it on the right side of the site. Enjoy


NBM rates The Dark Knight - A Work of Cinematic Art

No Strings Attached

I had a few reasons to watch this, but at the top of the list was the fact that Natalie Portman is a bit of a sex kitten without relationship needs. The story follows Adam (Kutcher) and Emma (Portman) as they meet each other again after about a 15 year hiatus. They want different things, but the one commonality is sex. It's human nature. I love the spin on the not so normal romantic comedy. Adam is a romantic, whereas Emma believes relationships will fail. There is no chance of survival. She poses a "friends with benefits" type of situation and as a male he is absolutely fine with that. The funny thing is his confidence in the fact that eventually she will fall for him. He will play by his rules, because playing second fiddle in the band is better than not playing at all. This is very reminiscent of that Seinfeld episode that started the phrase, "we used to date, but now we're just friends." Kevin Kline as Adam's father is super brilliant, but the biggest surprise was the Head doctor at Emma's place of employment is Carey Elwes. You will barely recognize him and though he is on screen a few different times, he only has like one speaking line. I'm still unsure of why he would be cast in that minor role. I mean, he is The Dread Pirate Roberts!! He deserves better. Anyway, I really enjoy the reversal of roles in the terms of the Male/Female psyche when it comes to monogamy and relationships. Adam is ready to go, but Emma is constantly enforcing the rules until it becomes too much for Adam. As with 98% of Rom-Coms, I'm sure you can guess where it will go. I love the underdog story and it was good to see Kutcher get a winning role, especially after Killers. Of course comparing Katherine Heigle to Natalie Portman is like comparing Hamburger to Steak. It's a no win for hamburger. Heigle, you are the hamburger in this analogy. Super sexy, raunchy fun with a great cast all around. Even the smaller players do awesome. Luda-cris is a surprising cast, but as always he is hilarious.


NBM rates No Strings Attached - Awesome.... Now we just have to wait on the Timberlake/Kunis version coming out called Friends with Benefits to see which one is better.

American Psycho

So this morning I happened upon a yard sale. There I saw a box of VHS tapes, which led me to say, "I have to return some tapes", which is the most used line in this brilliant film. It is set in the 1980's so it makes sense. Patrick Bateman (Bale) is a very rich investment banker in New York, but he becomes bored with his day to day. He has everything. A beautiful fiance' Evelyn Williams (Reese Witherspoon) who we only see a couple of times. He has money, gadgets, a killer home, a sense of vanity unmatched by anyone I have ever seen, and a love for watching movies. I assume this, since he always seems to have tapes that need returning. One night at a black tie dinner with his lady and all his high and mighty business friends something happens. He snaps. He needs something and doesn't know what that is, until a little later when he kills a hooker. This gets him the rush he has been searching for and he likes it. He has very little guilt about it, and when no cops coming looking for him, he figures he got away with it. His thirst is heightened and so from here on in the film he is bringing women to his place, having sex with him - where he stares at himself the whole time- then kills them in sometimes grotesque ways. A lot of people die by a lot of different means, but eventually it starts to get to him. The paranoia sets in and he can no longer function at work or with Evelyn. He soon feels like he has thrown it all away, but like everyone in the position of money and power, he feels there has to be a way out. The last ten minutes are the most intense along with the cherry on top for films of this nature. When it's all said and done, I guarantee your reaction will be, "Whaaaaaaaaat!!!!"

NBM rates American Psycho - Phenomenal

Ready to Rumble

With the passing of a legend, I feel I must give him the highest honor possible. A NBM tribute. Randy "Macho Man" Savage has been a staple in the wrestling community since the '80's. That really when it all blew up anyway. He has been in several films including the first Spiderman, but I wanna review a film about the sport itself, that he also cameoed in. I don't think this film has earned the respect it so deserves. If you are not a wresting fan, you may not have seen it. I saw it, as once upon a time a was a fair weather fan of the sport. From 1999-2002 I was into it. Not as much as some people I knew, but still. I am not ashamed that I would watch hours of live performances weekly, or that I spent high dollar to go to Monday Night Raw. It was awesome. As for you "crazies" that would pay the $60 for PPV and fashion a Champion belt out of Cardboard and duct tape (you knoe who you are), I can only say this...I hope someday, I can get behind anything that much. As for this film, it follows two die hard fans trying to help their favorite wrestler. Gordie (David Arquette) and Sean (Scott Caan) live, breathe, and eat wrestling. They are considered losers to everyone who knows them, but they don't care, because they have each other. They work as tag team pooper emptiers. Of course when the event heads near them, they will be there to support Jimmy King (Platt). When all goes wrong Jimmy is banish-ed and these two do not want to go on living. After months of looking for him, they found him. Now it is their personal mission to get him back in shape, back in the ring, and back on top. The dialog in the film is brilliant. I guess I get it, because I was around it for several years. He is a drunk, belligerent, bitter man who is afraid of "The Diamond Cutter" whether he will admit it or not. "Joey Pant's" plays the manager who sets in motion the elimination of Jimmy King's job, and he does not ever want him to come back. The plethora of WCW wrestlers that show up on screen as themselves is priceless. The way we get to see behind the curtain and the way it is all orchestrated is funny. I have liked this stupid movie for years now and I do recommend it only if you have a sense of humor that is so vast you can laugh at any aspect of any random thing. One last thing.... Macho Man, you were taken from us way too early, but since the world is ending tomorrow anyhow, I would love to join you in the big ring in the sky for at least a little while so we can "Snap into a Slim Jim" together.


NBM rates  - Ready to Rumble - Awesome

The Vanishing

When most people hear the name "Barney" they think of a crazy purple dinosaur who entertains children. Not me though. I think of the deranged professor who puts himself to the test on his theory of Good and Evil. Once again, Jeff Bridges proves himself as an elite actor. Jeff plays Barney. A man who seems to be a bit unsure of himself in every aspect of life. His marriage, his role as a Father, and even his professional career. His life perception is altered when he performs a heroic act without thinking. Based on instinct and reflex he jumps into a river to save a child. This gets him pondering. I am a hero, could I also be a villain? He decides to put himself to the test. He decides he will kidnap a random woman. After several failed attempts, which are hilarious by the way, he finally gets his victim. Diane (Bullock) is the girlfriend of Jeff (Kiefer) and she is taken from him when they stop for gas along their trip. This ruins Jeff's life as you could assume it would for anyone who's loved one just disappears. He spends every moment and every dollar he has trying to find her, when some years later, washed up with no hope he meets Rita (Nancy Travis). She helps clean him up and they start dating...even fall in love. Rita and Jeff are happy, but Jeff still can't let it go. His routine never falters. He still puts up new posters in the same spots week after week. Rita begins to take issue with this as any woman would. Jeff can't accept she is gone forever without having a definite answer. He promises to ease up and he does. Barney has seen the new sign and posters week after week and when they stop he has issue with it. He is cracked in the head. He decides to call Jeff and 'fess up, but only if Jeff is willing to play by his rules. Of course he does, and all of the sudden he is in way over his head with a mad man. Turns out Rita may be the smartest one of all. She is keen to whats going on and finds the best leverage possible. This is one of the all time great thrillers, and Barney is crazy sick. Great character played perfect.

NBM rates The Vanishing - Phenomenal

Troy

Timing, as they say, is everything. If this had come out 4 years earlier it may have had a shot at Oscar gold. Instead that ship sailed with Gladiator and took all the gold to be had for such period films with it. It is rare for me to buy a new DVD the day it comes out at that "new DVD price" sight unseen. This film was an easy exception for me. All I had to do was very simple math. Brad Pitt+Eric Bana+Orlando "I Love Shooting Arrows in Movies" Bloom+Rose Byrne+Peter O'Toole+Brian Cox+Diane Kruger+Sean Bean = How could it be bad? I also love the stories I had heard in minimal fashion turned into an epic 3 hour long brilliantly visual film. The story goes, Hector (Bana) son of King Priam and heir to the throne of Troy takes his brother, Paris (Bloom) to sign a peace treaty with the King of Sparta. All is well until Paris smuggles the Kings wife, Helen (Kruger) on their ship of her own accord. She is running away with him back to Troy, which single handedly launched 1000 ships, as I'm sure you've heard. Though the Spartan Army is vast, they still would be advantageous to have the great warrior Achilles (Pitt) fighting with them. After he denies them, but his much younger not as well trained cousin Patrocles (Tron's Garrett Hedlund) accepts, he must go along to look out for him in battle. Early on we our shown how much Achilles thrives as a warrior. He understands battle and survival. He knows how to kill a man quickly and he relishes in the victories. Later we see how tormented he is. Achilles and Hector have a great one on one sword fight in the middle of the film. Paris shows his true colors as a lover, not a fighter, and we really get to feel a Kings sorrow for his sons. We all know the story of The Trojan Horse and I feel it was executed perfectly for the big screen. Achilles is ruthless, but selfish. He considers himself an independent contractor of sorts. He does not take orders and he takes what he wants. By the time his feelings are reciprocated, it may be too late. We all know what the fall of Achilles was, and how this was portrayed was a little lacking for me. The whole movie is strewn with characters. Almost too many to keep track of. The long run time is not without purpose. Some times long films can be dissected by the viewer. We always want things to be to the point. I don't recall any scenes I thought should have been cut. It was all completely necessary and very well directed. It must be good as I have watched it 3 times now. It is enjoyable, with good action and battle scenes, along with the best Hollywood has to offer.


NBM rates Troy - Awesonomenal

Sherlock Holmes

Whomever wasn't excited to see RD Jr. take on Holmes after he succeeded at Tony Stark must be crazy. The one other YAAAA factor was the director. Guy Ritchie. Better known for his seedy underground London gangsta films like Snatch, Lock, Stock, and Rock n Rolla, he has had no success with any other form of film. Swept Away anyone? Luckily Holmes is along the lines of his criteria, only difference is the year. Usually he shoots present day, but he did a wonderful, even superb, job of recreating the era. Holmes and Watson. Everyone has heard those names, but to see them on the big screen with such a good script was really awesome. The story follows the investigations of Holmes, but more specifically the one case he has trouble with. Lord Blackwood (Mark Strong) is an evil man who is believed to have mystical powers provided by black magic or satan or something of that nature. Holmes finally gets him and he is hanged till dead. Unfortunately he prophesies his return from the dead and it seems to come just the way he said it would. His evil reign now continues and Watson, who pronounced him dead are in big trouble. Holmes is now under investigation by Scotland Yard for messing up certain things. When Irene (McAdams) comes back into Holmes life, Watson knows it can't be good. She is the only person he could never figure out and it perturbed  him, plus he gets in more than his usual trouble in her presence. The action is among the best ever, along with the way the story is pre-told before it happens. Holmes will see a situation, narrate how he will win it, the scene goes in slow mo in tune with his thoughts, then when he does react it happens perfectly. If any of you watch the Mentalist then you already realize how similar Holmes acts to Patrick Jane with his sense of perception. Jude Law is magnificent as usual, and RB Jr has another priceless character to add to his rapidly growing repertoire. I can't wait for the sequel this December. It took me all of 3-4 weeks to see the first one, and I really only went based on the recommendation of close friends. I do not see myself waiting that long on the second installment.

NBM rates Sherlock Holmes - Phenomenal

Inglourious Basterds

If there is one specific director that does not need media coverage to help his films do well, It's got to be Quentin Tarantino. Fortunately for us, the Inglourious Basterds ads were among the best and most clever I have ever been witness to. Like most Tarantino films, this one is segmented into very different stories that all tie together eventually. I had to watch this 2 and a half hour film in the theater and I was quite the preacher when it was done. I told everyone how magnificent it was, and they better not miss out. Christoph Waltz won his Oscar for his role as Col. Hans Landa of the SS Third Reich. He may be the most deserving winner I have ever seen. From the opening scene where he calmly sniffs out the Jews at a dairy farm. He speaks multiple languages and smokes one hell of a beautiful pipe. The promo posters of individual characters labeled like "Brad Pitt is a Basterd" were awesome. The story starts out with Col. Hans Landa doing his job as a Jew Hunter. He is the number one man for that job and he revels in it. He loves the hunt, the challenge, and the power. Then we have a group of American Jews sent to Europe to kill Nazi's (Nat-zees) and strike fear into the Third Reich. Lt. Aldo Raine (Pitt) heads of this group of rag tag guys called Basterds who don't give a crap about anything other than killing and scalping Nazi's. As good of a group as this is, there are two characters that set apart from the rest. The Bear Jew (Eli Roth) as he is called uses a baseball bat to beat info out of the Nazi's. Then there is Hugo Stiglitz (Til Schweiger) who is a German prisoner who is busted out by the Basterds for his willingness to kill his own people. The film is really about killing Hitler of course and the sub stories are how this all comes about. Bridget Von Hammersmark (Diane Kruger) is an actress and an ally to the Basterds. She has the connections to get into the right places. The soon to be Magneto (Michael Fassbender) in X-Men First Class makes a good appearance as one of Hammersmark's contacts. The Basterds are always on the lookout for a fresh scalp and they make up the bloody portion of the film. A young theater owner and survivor of Hans Landa named Shosanna is the key element to getting all the Nazi players in the same place, while Hammersmark is in charge of getting Aldo and his men inside the German-heavy theater. At this point they must become actors themselves. They must play like the are Spanish film crew members and when they have to speak, it is absolutely priceless. I love how fictional this movie is, and when it's over you will wish this was how it went down...ya know, instead of alone, in a bunker with his one testicle, and a single bullet. I have said it before and I stand behind it. This is Tarantino's best film. Pulp Fiction has the cult status + 17 years under it's belt, but Basterds really shows everything this wonderful director is capable of. 

NBM rates Inglourious Basterds - A Cinematic Work of Art

Blue Valentine

I'm sure you heard of this movie during award season. It's an indie that was up for all kinds of awards. Ryan Gosling (Love him) and Michelle Williams (Eh) are a married couple and this film follows the beginning of their relationship up until the end of it. Although it was not specified, my conclusion was the relationship lasted between 5 and 6 years. Not too long in the realm of "Forever". The film does a good job on how it's laid out. It starts present day and follows for a couple hours in the routine to get the audience's feet wet with what these people are about. Then it flashes back to before they met. It follows her and we quickly see the lack of self worth she is carrying with her. He, on the other hand, is super confident and the world is his oyster. He is a moving man and his attitude towards his job is phenomenal. He does it to the fullest of his ability without complaint. His attitude is really portrayed perfectly when he has to move an elderly man from his home to an assisted living facility. This scene shows his character brilliantly. He actually meets her in that facility while she hangs out with her grandmother. He wants to know her and won't be denied. She denies him, but he doesn't quit and they end up hanging out and really getting to know each other. The film goes back and forth in great fashion. What I love about this film and indie film in general is the footage we see that is utterly pointless. A lot of indie films feels like documentaries. The dialogue and inside jokes and comfy silences. That is life. As depressing as this was to watch, 50% of married people end in divorce, so there is a very real factor to this film. It goes back and forth from the great times to the worst times constantly. I enjoyed it, but it is not 90% happy and 10% sad. Its 50/50 throughout. When given the choice between "Cupid's Cove" and "The Future Room", I, like Gosling, would go Futuristic every time. It's hard to pick a side in this movie. Most of the time it is a cut and dry case. Him or her? It's that simple. Not here. We don't get the whole story. In fact we have to assume whatever the hell we want to. I have my opinions, but I will let you watch ot and form your own.


NBM rates Blue Valentine - Awesome

Varsity Blues

So, I posed the question yesterday, "Movies with awesome soundtracks?". The feedback was astonishing. This film came up because for my era, this was a high school movie that came out when I was in high school.  The music included, but was not limited to Foo Fighters, Collective Soul, Green Day, Van Halen, and Days of the New. That was perfect to me and everyone else at that point in their life. I remember where and who I saw this movie with. Still to this day, I walk in the Premier 6 theater, like I did yesterday, I look in the theater off the corner of the lobby that seems almost out of place, and without fail I am whisked back to the day my life improved. What improved it? 3 words... Whip Cream Bikini. A movie starring a bunch of unknown kids who would become some of Hollywood's big hitters following their turn as High Schoolers. Scott Caan plays Tweeder. A wide receiver womanizer (Hmmm, wonder who he shadowed to figure out how to be a womanizer) who provides most of the memorable lines. Ally Larter (Dairy Bikini girl) would later star in the Final Destination series and on TV's Heroes. Amy Smart showed up big in Road Trip, Crank, and The Butterfly Effect. This was Paul Walker's first opportunity to show to the world that he can't act, but his career has flourished. Then there's James Van Der Beek. The star of the film had already had success with Dawson's Creek, but funny enough his film career essentially began and ended with this film. I actually like Van Der Beek and would like to see more from him. It follows the trials and tribulations of life long friends in a small (fictitious) town in Texas. It more closely follows John Moxon (VDBeek). He is back up to Lance (Walker) who is the star QB for the Coyotes football team. Mox doesn't want to be a ball player, but in this town it's just what you do. The coach is the constant winning Bud Kilmer (Jon Voight). He brings an intensity to the role as only a seasoned actor could. He actually reminds me of a coach I actually had. When Lance goes down with injury, Mox is called up and his life is changed. He didn't want any part of the "scene", when he was in the shadows, but upon becoming the star he relished in it. The parties, the girls, the lack of accountability for his actions. Kilmer has a big problem with his new QB, probably because he likes to think for himself, and he has opinions in his head that Kilmer did not plant there. It's a great combination of high school sports-and politics- the fun and hatred that lies in the middle of it all, and the stress to win. The climax deals with Mox and Coach Kilmer butting heads to say the least. It is very dramatic as all sports movies are. It is funny when it should be, sexy when it should be, and all around a well written movie.  This is just one of those films that will always have a place in my heart that most will not understand unless they were in High School when it was released. Talk to anyone my age and they will say the same.


NBM rates Varsity Blues - Phenomenal

Bridesmaids

When I first started hearing about this movie I was kind of intrigued. At the same time, I thought it was a chick flick that would be best served on DVD for the low price of $1. Then the pieces started to fall into place. Judd Apatow produced. The Hangover with women. Rated R. Extremely vile and offensive. Now I'm listening. Kristin Wiig has been absolutely hilarious whether it was SNL or Knocked Up. Always a solid comedic performance. Then add Maya Rudolph, and Melissa McCarthy and you get comedy gold. The story follows Annie (Wiig) and Lillian (Rudolph) are best friends since childhood. Both have kind of messy lives with little direction, but when Lillian gets engaged, that's when Annie really realizes where she is in life. Annie is of course appointed Maid of Honor. Annie is ecstatic until she meets Helen(Rose Byrne), who is the wife of Lillian's future husband's boss. She is a control freak who tries not only to take over every aspect of the planning part, but wants to slide into the best friend slot to Lillian. Annie's real issue with Helen actually stems back to her own failures in life. She can't be happy for Lillian, because she cannot get her relationships to work, her job to be good, or her housing situation to be normal. This is not about the bachelorette party, but more about the planning of a wedding and the stress that brings. Of all the cast members the one that steals the show is the heavy set McCarthy, who plays future sister in law Megan. Every scene she is in is side splitting laughable. As in all movies there are usually a few scenes that set it apart from the rest. The airplane, the dress shop, and the bridal shower are just that for this film. In the middle of all her mess, Annie meets a really great guy, but like everything else in her life she is bound to screw that up also. I was so happy to see women be as perverse as men, and to use such foul language. It's basically an all woman movie with the exception of John Hamm (Who is brilliant) and Chris O'Dowd as Rhodes the cop who provides great inspiration with an Irish accent. This is not the run of the mill movie that is appealing only to the ladies, but is actually enjoyable to all. 


NBM rates Bridesmaids - Phenomenal

X2: X-Men United

I am going to end Marvel week with not only my favorite Marvel film, but also a film that is synonymous with being called "better than its predecessor." That is hard for a sequel to do in any franchise or genre. Bryan Singer is a master behind the camera and when you watch The Last Stand after watching X2 you will see what seperates him from ordinary movie makers. X2 also did something extremely tricky. It introduced us to new characters that help thicken the plot, but at the same time didn't take away from what we wanted to see. The plethera of characters in this film are vast and outstanding. Sometimes too many can be, well, too much. The sub plots can be watered down to make sure every one gets enough screen time. I don't speak for anyone but myself when I say, I am most interested in the body count Wolverine will rack up. He is my guy. There is no one more BA than him, and he accepts who he is. Some of the new characters we meet are Iceman (Cool), Pyro (Cool), Colossus (Cool though brief), Lady Deathstrike (Wolverine in a hot female body), and The Nightcrawler (Freakin amazing). The movie really is based around him and his actions. He attempts to kill the President, which leads directly into a mutant-human war. More directly it is based on William Stryker and his attempt to shut down Xaviers school for gifted youngsters. Stryker actually had a son that Xavier could not help and William holds him personally responsible. He has now made it his mission to abolish every mutant from the planet. When Stryker gets unlimited governmental authority against the mutant race he invades the school to take prisoners. Unfortunately for them Logan has recently come home. Essentially he is the babysitter. When the raid hits he unleashes hell and it is awesome. That is one of the best action sequences ever. From here it just gets awesome. Magneto is able to break out of his plastic prison in an absolutely brilliant fashion. He and Mystique team up with Xavier in order to stop the extermination of their race. Magneto actually has his own plan for Stryker. It is a pure movie that lacks nothing. The fight scene with Deathstrike and Wolverine is awesome. I watch this film several times a year. Pyro is pretty cool and he gets some good scenes where he gets to blow stuff up. I also like the Jean Gray story and how she is dealing with her dark phoenix. Pay attention to the shadow in the water before the credits roll. If you haven't seen this film I feel sorry for you.


***I would also like to add that my Spider-Man 3 review from 5/11/2011 has been removed by Blogger, but I have been told it will repost soon.***

NBM rates X2 - A Work of Cinematic Art

Spider-Man 3

So this may shock many of you, but Spidey is my least favorite Marvel character and my absolute least favorite franchise of films. Everybody loves them, but me, not so much. I don't know what it is, but when I began reading about the reboot I was relieved. I had always known I didn't like Tobey Maguire as Peter Parker/Spider-Man. He just seemed to puss-like to be a B.A. superhero. The first Spider-Man was only decent for an origin story. I mean, look at X-Men, IronMan, and now Thor. All of those are way better firsts than Spider-Man in my opinion. The 2nd one was better and the 3rd one was right in the middle of the first two. I liked the 3rd one, but I did feel there were too many characters. We have Peter Parker feeling good about himself after his meltdown in #2. Then he and MJ are really getting good with each other when a black goo infiltrates his motor scooter. This black "Venom" attaches itself to his suit and he becomes a bit hedonistic and self loving with a hint of defiance. He likes the attitude this new suit gives him, but in fact he turns into a combo prick / wuss I like to call prickipuss. When he finally figures out that this new attitude is not good for him, he is barely able to shake the parasitic thing. Apparently it is terrified of high pitch bells. Then an ex con gets radioactively sand blasted or something and becomes a sort of Sand Man. He calls himself Sandman. Clever. Way to think outside the box. When I saw the Sandman crumble to grains then sweep away in blu ray I was actually blown away. The detail was the best I have ever seen in any film. When Parker finally shakes the Venomous goop, it attaches itself to a much more willing host who Parker got fired from his photography career. Now Venom is played by Topher Grace, and though I recall the Venom/SpiderMan archrivalry as the best in almost any comic book, it doesn't really play out like I thought it should. He has to deal with Venom and Sandman, save MJ, gets some help from the once scorned Harry (Hobgoblin), shake a disease, and figure some personal stuff out. See, complicated. This is the first time in history I can recall a Multi Billion Dollar franchise getting a complete recast reboot that is unnecessary. Funny about that, I am actually all for it. Andrew Garfield as PP and the awesome Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy, I really think it will be fantastic. As for Spider-Man 3....

NBM rates it - Awesome

The Punisher

I really wanted to do this version of The Punisher for Marvel week. I don't want to take away from Dolph, but this one is better, and as I have not seen "War zone", so this is what's left. Good thing though. War zone made me mad. All the Thomas Jane drama, then he was no longer attached to it, then it seemed like it was thrown together and rushed to theaters. I thought Thomas Jane played Frank Castle really well, but at the same time, by 2004 when it was released we had already been given X-Men and X2, Spiderman, and Blade. With that said I wish The Punisher had been given a good budget. It still felt more on the cheesy 1990's style as opposed to the level of quality we had seen in the listed films above. I feel like The Punisher is one of the greatest Marvel characters ever. He is a vigilante. Unlike DC's Batman, Frank has no issue taking lives that deserve to be taken. When you think about it he seems to be one of the only comic book heroes with no conscience towards human life. In this attempt to reboot this particular franchise we see how Frank becomes The Punisher. Frank is a government agent working undercover when he is close to closing the case he has been on. When it's all over he thought he concealed his identity, but when the son of a major crime lord, Howard Saint (Travolta) is killed during the raid, Castle now has a price on his head. Reunited with his family, he is hunted down by Saint's men and no one survives. They kill his wife, son, parents....everyone except him. He manages to live only to become The Punisher. He will not stop until Saint and his organization is burned to the ground. He doesn't want them arrested, he wants them dead. He figures if he gets killed in the process it doesn't matter. He has already lost everything that matters. In his healing process he meets a few individuals that seem useless to him, but they prove themselves invaluable. The two of these new friends that you will recognize are played by Rebecca Romijn and Ben Foster. At one point Foster is tortured for info that would lead to Frank, but he gives them nothing even though several of his piercings were removed improperly and without his permission. I don't want to give anything away, but the way Frank plays Howard against his best friend Quinton is very clever. The Punisher is one of the all time great comic book characters and this films depicts him very well in my opinion. With that said, I would like to see Marvel take a lot of time and effort into a new Punisher series that is dark, gritty, and rated R for violence. 

NBM rates The Punisher - Awesome

The Incredible Hulk

With the brilliant Thor review yesterday and Captain America just around the corner, along with Hawkeye, another Wolverine film and The Avengers coming, I will begin Marvel week yesterday. When The Incredible Hulk got re-booted after the unfathomable Ang Lee version of '03, I was skeptical. This is why I did not watch it for a long time. Finally I decided that it was time. I was really stoked about Ed Norton as Bruce Banner, but at the same time, I really like Eric Bana and we all know how that one went. What I really got behind was the supporting cast. Liv Tyler, William Hurt, and Tim Roth. When Bruce Banner aka The Hulk (Norton) surfaces in South America after being in hiding for a while. Hiding? Oh yeah, from the U S government. We all know he was an experiment gone wrong. He doesn't want to be a caged animal, but they feel he is a harm to himself and everyone around him. I liked how quickly we get to see The Hulk. That's why we watch after all. When he comes back to the States for a possible cure, he is hunted and attacked, which makes him angry. At this point it goes from pretty good to freakin awesome. Especially after he kicks Tim Roth - Supercop - into a mature tree breaking his body. He is given the new serum which turns him into an adversary to both Hulk and his former employer. Even though Hulk seems to be a brainless being when in that form, his new nemesis Abomination is pure evil. He will purposely destroy anyone who gets in his way to take down Hulk. Their Battle Royale (with cheese?) is insanely well done and by the end we learn a little something about Hulk. I also love the forethought on Marvel's part to begin tying together these films for the 2012 release of The Avengers. Tony Stark shows up at the end of the credits in this film and that was 2008. Forethought. I was a little disappointed Norton couldn't come to an agreement to retain his role, but I Do Love Mark Ruffalo, so I am very interested in the direction it will take us.

NBM rate The Incredible Hulk - Awesome

Thor

Where to begin. First off, let me offer my personal thank you to all No Bad Movie readers.  This is "Superman's" first guest write and what is more ironic than a DC comic "super hero" writing to you about a Marvel comic "god".  You heard me right, a god, god of thunder that is.  Thor has finally been introduced and added to the collection of Marvel superheros and man I tell you he doesn't disappoint.  The story actually has some good substance to it.  There is a bit of fantasy with the storyline taking place partially in Asgard.  1 of 8 realms where the god's reside and watch over and protect our race and our planet.  This fantasy line of the story merges up well with reality bringing the character to "Life".  The myth and the magic fade away as Thor walks amongst the mortal for a good part of his time on earth.  His trip to earth, or should I say banishment, seems to bring the qualities of a king or hero out of him thus making him a perfect candidate for future crime fighting good.  As with all reviews, you cannot reveal the story for it will ruin the experience.  But I tell you this,  up until Friday afternoon at 12:30pm  I would have to say my favorite superhero movie was Ironman 1 but Thor now stands side by side with Tony Stark.   So beyond telling you what the movie is about, the action, drama, comedy, love interest are all worth the trip to the theater. It will be a BluRay purchase on a future Tuesday evening upon it's release and I will never look at a hammer as a mere tool ever again!

Few points of interest and easter eggs to look for:  Stay till the very end of the rolling credits.  Little Avenger cameo by Mr. Fury.  Potential Avenger story line introduced???? Also I didn't think anyone noticed it but me but there is another Avenger cameo during the film.  Look at the sharpshooter about half way through the film.  Recognize him? He has an unaccredited role but with a little digging you can find the tie.  Also look for the Stan the Man cameo. Stan Lee is sort of my Where's Waldo in Marvel films.  Also Chris Hemsworth is my new man crush.  That dude was ripped for this film!

NBM concurs with Superman's rating of Thor - Phenomenal

I, Jester, saw Thor today and when it was over I could not believe how much I enjoyed it. Way better than I had anticipated.

Thank You For Smoking

The MOD squad as they refer to themselves in the film are Bobby Jay (Koechner), Polly (Maria Bello) and Nick (Eckhart). MOD stands for Merchants of Death. They have self appointed their little group of three this because of the organizations they represent. Bobby Jay represents the Firearms community, while Polly is on Alcohol duty, but Nick is with Big Tobacco. They convene once a week to discuss how many people their products have killed and some of the sob stories that made the news in the recent week. Lawsuits that have been filed and the weakness of the the Human emotion that is greed. Money solves everything. At least that is what Nick Naylor believes. These 3 not only represent these organizations, but speak solely on their behalf when a problem arises. They invite the press or leave them, depending on the angle they can use. They use quick tactics, and shady doings to keep people quiet. Not shady so much, but as I said before Greed. They use greed against the person giving them issues at the time. Sacks of money is enough for anyone to redact their story / lawsuit / and bad mouthing of anything. Am I wrong? Nick loves his job and he doesn't care that he is called a murderer to his face. He simply states that people can make their own choices and all the warnings and info are up front and easy to read. He can spin anything to sound any way he needs it to. He can get people to change their mind within 30 minutes of meeting him. He has saved the Tobacco industry bazillions of dollars with his silver tongue. Nothing is a problem because he does a good job of keeping his work life and personal life separate. He has a son with his ex wife that he spends every other weekend with. His son is 13 or so and smart enough to realize what is going on. As much as Nick tries to keep his son in the dark about what he does, eventually the questions begin. Nick may lie bend the truth for his paycheck, but he will never tell his son a lie or a half truth. He still believes in honesty. His son feels he needs more so he asks to go along to one of the people suing them. It happens to be the man who was the Marlboro Man from the 70's. He is played by Sam Elliot - Perfect choice, and he is dying from years of product use. Nick takes his son into the situation and shows him how it is done, but something changes for Nick. Maybe he feels he has sold the BS for so long he can't even tell when he is "Normal Nick" or "Working Nick". He begins to dissect his entire life and it turns from a comedy about the death of billions of people into a dark drama about Nick's choices and what lies ahead. Will he continue on this path or try and change for the benefit of his son? I remember the first time I watched this. I was absolutely floored. I was laughing at how convincing he would be in his arguments, but at the same time you kind of think "Hmm, that actually makes sense." It is very up front with numbers and figures being spouted off every other scene about the number of lives lost, but it never feels like an "agenda movie." The brilliant Ivan Reitman's son, Jason, directs this superb film, and it's not a film I will purposely put in from time to time, but if I come across it on a movie channel I will watch at least 20 minutes of it, if not more. The speeches and dialogue are something to cherish. Writing this clever does not come along very often, so I say embrace it for what it is. A really great movie....and Robert Duvall is also in it.

NBM rates Thank You For Smoking - Phenomenal

(500) Days of Summer

I have had this film on my DVR for months and just couldn't find the time to watch it. This is surprising because I love independent film, I love JGL, and I love Zooey. The story intrigued me. It follows Tom (Gordon Levitt) on his quest for love. He meets Summer and feels like she is the one. This is where it goes from ordinary Rom-Com to anything but. Summer doesn't believe in "True Love" or Soul mates. She thinks relationships are BS, but she doesn't mind having friends. The direction will amaze you in every facet. It's a movie that should be easy to follow along, but the way it is cut makes it a little more complex. Not so much story wise, but timeline wise. If you aren't glued to the screen you will not know if the movie is in the present or the past. The story follows Tom and Summer through a period of 500 days. It must shift back and forth 30 times throughout. It starts off with Tom in misery somewhere in the 230 day range then it shifts to day 1. Day 1 is not the beginning of their relationship, but the actual day he sees her for the first time. It actually takes Tom a while to nerve up and actually hang out with her. At which point he finds out from her that relationships are pointless path ways to pain and mess. He thinks she is wrong and intends to prove it. It is chronological to a point. Every flashback is a more recent day than before and every flash forward is a further day into the ultimate 500 days. I cannot say enough good things about this movie. I don't have a whole lot to preach about it. I will say it is heartfelt and acted to perfection, and just another reason why JGL is in my Top 5 favorite actors right now. The jokes are really well done, but the dialogue is brilliant. It is an easy watch that will have you enthralled with the opening narrative, and having you rolling with every team meeting Tom has to attend at his job where he writes greeting cards. Watch this movie. It appealed to me, but more importantly my wife couldn't concentrate on her book, had to put it down, and sat there in peace for the duration. It really does have mass appeal. There is not an individual group that would not appreciate this film for what it delivers.

NBM rates (500) Days of Summer - Phenomenal Bordering on Cinematic Art.

Buy It

Water for Elephants

Where to begin? Hmmm, I was Team Edward, but now I may be team Jacob.....Janikowski that is. So, I know how Star Power works and sometimes it doesn't work as it is supposed to. Robert Pattinson will put butts in the seats. Mostly under age butts, but nonetheless. Here is the timeline of the female agenda with Mr. Pattinson. "Oh, Edward is in a new movie." What is Water for Elephants? I better do some research. Huh, It's actually a book. So, what's the book about? I gotta buy that book. Read, Read, Read...Done. I have to see this film. That is pretty accurate from what I remember, and I have a memory like an Elephant. OOOOH, pretty good tie in. I love movies, and my wife doesn't "Need" to see many movies like I do, but this was one she wasn't going to miss out on. I obliged her not knowing much of the premise except that it revolved around a circus and the the creepiest folk ever...Carnies..Small hands. Basically it starts out how I love movies to begin. It begins with an old man who tells a story of his life. His life which essentially takes place during the year 1931. It is a great era for a film. The Depression is really depressing to watch, but the film does a superb job of making it light to a point. They are able to do this because the circus is no ordinary place. When Jacob (Pattinson) is about to take, and ace, his final exam at Cornell something horrible happens and derails him from his dreams of being a veterinarian he doesn't know what to do. He jumps a train to escape and that happens to be the Benzini circus train. He takes a job shoveling poo, but has nowhere else to go. It doesn't take him long to become the personal Benzini Vet - Which Ringling Bros. does not have. For him this is good, for August (Christolph Waltz) not so much. August runs a tight ship based on fear. If you do not conform to his ways he will "red light" you. Jacob quickly realizes this, but has a reason to stay. August's wife, Marlena (Witherspoon). She sees something in Jacob that she has never seen in her husband. Compassion. They grow a platonic relationship during their travels, but it could quickly become more, and with August's temperament that would not be good. When Benzini circus is close to failure they acquire the biggest attraction in the country. An elephant named Rosie. Rosie does several things. She shows what August is really capable of, shows Marlena what Jacob is all about., and shows Jacob he can do anything. It's a great story with a very traumatic ending. The last 20 minutes I had chills. CHILLS DAMMIT. I also must say that as great as Pattinson is as someone other than a vampire, Waltz once again steals the show. He is brilliant. One last thing, I watched this at The Premier 6 Theatre which made it way better. Why? It is set in 1931 and this theater still uses 35mm film instead of digital. Because of this, we could hear the loud rattle of the projector cycling through 24 frames per second. It was the perfect pairing of film and nostalgia. Sometimes I have a rating in mind when I start writing and it changes as I remember back to what I saw. I am not sure it is Phenomenal, but I was going to rate it Awesome. So...

NBM rates Water for Elephants - Awesonomenal

The Tourist

I haven't necessarily been putting off watching this film, but I know it did take me a while to get it done. I was actually eager to see it. It had nothing to do with the trailers or press I had seen. It had a lot to do with what the "critics" were saying about it, and how they ripped it to pieces. I tried to recall this week when the last time was that I did not like something Jolie had done. It proved difficult. I actually don't even have an example. Then I did the same test with Depp. Even harder to find one. Both of these superb actors really pick and choose the roles they want to do. They don't need to work and they don't need the money, so the pickiness is why their films are generally between really good and great. I figured "how bad could it be?" Well, I will tell you, IT WAS AWFUL!!!!. Wait, wait, wait, I kid. This is not that type of website. We love films. I actually really enjoyed this film. It draws us in rather quickly, and keeps us guessing the entire time. It starts out in France, but quickly shifts to Venice. The film is very little action, loads of intrigue and drama, with just a perfect splash of that quirky Depp comedy. It starts out with a surveillance team following Elise (Jolie). We don't know why or what they want from her, but that quickly comes to light. Her husband, which no one has ever seen or even knows what he looks like. Apparently he stole from some bad men, but that's only a sub plot. The movie is called the Tourist for a reason. I'm guessing it follows a tourist of some kind. Ding. An American tourist named Frank (Depp). He is involved because Elise is sent word by her husband to pick a random guy out that looks enough like him to throw off the scent. The Man with One Red Shoe anyone? She picks out Frank and starts a charade unbeknownst to him. All of the sudden he is being chased and she is being chased and he is confused to say the least. They want a man named Alexander, not Frank. They do think he is Alexander. It is full of twists and turns and a couple of really good actors show up that I did not expect. Paul Bettany who is going to be in Priest this summer along with Dark City's Rufus Sewell. It did have us guessing what was going to happen and who the actual Alexander was. I like movies that get you guessing, but aren't so complicated you forget what you've been trying to figure out. It was done very well and the ending was pretty good too. 

NBM rates The Tourist - Awesome

Demolition Man

So after viewing the first half of this film the other night for the first time in some years, it reaffirmed to me that I was right. It is awesome. And look at the up and comers it produced. Sandra Bullock and Benjamin Bratt for instance. This movie single handedly catapulted them into stardom. Its funny to me how the film portrays the legal system. If you are guilty and punished, then you are frozen for length of the sentence. I don't like it. If you are frozen for 50 years, you basically got a non aging 50 year refreshing nap. It kind of negates the point of punishment. I mean, unless you have horrible aging side effects like Mel Gibson in "Forever Young" then its just stupid. If you were thawed 20 years later and you aged that 20 years in a matter of a week then dies of old age, it would actually be considered cruel and unusual and then I could get behind it. This story follows a super cop, John Spartan (Stallone)(Sylvester not Frank) who is a great cop in the 20th century. His nemesis is Simon Phoenix (Snipes). After years of trying to get him, he finally does. Unfortunately several hostages are accidentally blown up in the process and not on does Phoenix gets "iced" but so does Spartan. When Phoenix is accidentally paroled early, he goes on a rampage. Good for him, bad for everyone else. You see, crime is all but non existent in this new century. The police force cannot subdue him, or even slow him down, so they must now thaw the old school Spartan to apprehend him once again. The future cracks me up. Citations for swearing, no physical contact, you wipe your butt with sea shells, and Taco Bell is the premier restaurant to eat at. Denis Leary is in charge of the underground community of thieves and beggars. These petty people are the real reason Phoenix was thawed out. Its a great action movie that depicts a future I would not want to be a part of. No guns or sex or cursing? You can keep it. I do love this film. We were talking about the transition from cheesy action movies to the point when they got more real and seriously good. Demolition Man may have been one of the last great campy action films. I will research it further and give a more definite answer at a later time.


NBM rates Demolition Man - Awesonomenal