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Thursday, March 31, 2011

Quick Change

A movie about a clown that takes over a bank so he can rob it? Hostages and all? What's so good about this? Bill F*ing Murray (I know that's not his real middle name). The first, second, and fourth time I watched this film, I had no idea Bill Directed it. That makes it's appeal all the more brilliant to me. It was his first and last time behind the camera. I guess he had to try it at least once. That's just Bill. Look at his recent catalog of films and that goes to show you, there is no method to his madness, and I love it. He is probably the most iconic actor of the last 30 years, and it's hard to believe Quick Change is 21 years young. Grimm (Murray) waltzes into the bank, sticks a gun in the guards face, and now we have a hostage situation. With Jason Robards cast to be the lead negotiator, looking to retire with a spotless record, he is the perfect man for the job. As the film rolls along, the negotiations get hilarious. Grimm's stupid requests are brilliant and never duplicated until another film's hostage takers ask for naked pictures of Bea Arthur. So, Grimm is buying time while waisting the cops time by "ordering" ridiculous hard to find items..monster truck anyone? This is where the plan goes from busted to brilliant. He agrees to let some of the hostages go. He releases Phyllis (Geena Davis), Loomis (R. Quaid) and himself (in no make-up). These three hostages tell a horrifying tale of capture and they are relieved to be out and alive. Once these three aquaintances leave the scene they are on their way with the loot they stole. The perfect plan. Grimm continues to call Chief Rotzinger (Robards), to demand more things to make him less angry with society. It's all going perfectly, until, well, HONK. They go from no one following them to loads of cops hot on their trail. It is an absolutely hysterical comedy that really is the epitome of what Bill does as an actor. Just another quality film to add to his repertoire. Quick Change does not get old. I would love to see a high quality 25th anniversary edition hit the stores in a few years, unfortunately Randy Quaid would need to sign off on it, and he's in Canada for an undetermined amount of time. Keep looking over your shoulder buddy. Don't let those "Hollywood assassins" keep you down.

NBM rates Quick Change - Phenomenal

Buy It

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Pan's Labyrinth

2 "Labyrinth" movies in a row? That's the quality writing we represent at NBM for all you readers who love us...well, me. So, I will admit, this is a tough one. It's trippy, creepy, confusing, and not in ENGLISH. Much to the A-Bomb's and my surprise, when we popped it in a couple years ago, only to exclaim "Is the whole movie subtitled?!" APPARENTLY. Oh well, we rented, we watched. I actually really enjoyed this film. Set in 1944 Spain, Ofelia (Ivana Baquero) moves with her preggers mother to the home of her yet to born siblings baby's daddy, who happens to be a Capitan in the Spanish Army. He is a ruthless prick, and does not like his step daughter. She needs an escape, but at 8 years old or so, where can she go? One night a fairy visits her and leads her to a faun who tells her of what she needs to do. She has several tasks to complete and if she fails once, she fails. She must complete her tasks to prove she is the true princess and will also reveal who her father is...The King. It is an extremely strange fairy tale, that is extremely scary at moment (See pic above). By far one of the creepiest things I have ever been witness to. Ofelia has a bit of a troubled life and she is one of the lucky ones who finds an escape. This movie stayed entertaining throughout, and left us with a pretty good twisted ending. I have only seen it once, but I would not mind at all to read it all over again.

NBM rates Pan's Labyrinth - Awesome


Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Jim Henson's Labyrinth

A-Bomb and I try and have a classic movie night at least once a week. When we started doing this, we did not have guidelines. I'd say we made it all the way to week #2 when we posed the question, "What's Classic?" We concurred that 25 years from the year we are occupying should be considered classic. That puts anything released in 1986 as classic to us. When researching 1986 movies, I realized how great of a year that actually was for film. Right in the middle of the year, The Labyrinth was released. Jim Henson's Labyrinth to be more accurate. Jim Henson - famous for creating The Muppets had a crazy imagination. Labyrinth is most definitely a movie that if you grew up with, as I did, it's awesome. If you didn't see it until adulthood, you would probably take the perspective of "The dumbest movie ever." Unless you viewed it on drugs, then you would probably say in an extremely lackadaisical voice - "Whooooooooaa." It starts off with Sarah (Jennifer B to B) (Watch Requiem for a Dream to get that reference), unable to enjoy her Friday night, because she has to babysit her toddler brother Toby. She is more than unhappy with the situation so she chants a chant for The Goblin King to come and take him away. Then Poof - he's gone. To say she is freaked out is an understatement. Goblin King, Really? Kidnapper in drag more like it. He takes Toby and feels Toby now belongs to him. She made a verbal contract. She then enters The Labyrinth where Jareth the Goblin King is...well, King. Played to perfection by David Bowie, I don't know of anyone else that flamboyantly straight that could've pulled that off in 1986. Maybe Danny Glover, but probably not. Sarah must complete the maze in due time in order to not lose her Brother forever. The cast of characters and sets that she encounters are magnificent. Hoggle helps guide her to a point, but he is kind of a punk. Then there's Ludo. A big hairy sweetheart tat looked like a Wookie and Ton-ton had a baby. He is a big baby, but strong, so he comes in handy. There are lots of obstacles she faces on her journey, but none so fierce as The King himself. The set pieces are awesome. David Bowie resemblance is hidden is=n several scenes, and I only noticed a couple of them for the first time the last time I watched it, which was like 8 months ago. This movie is so mind blowingly good, I just wished it was on the "Required viewing" list at school. Let me do a report on that. As an adult, there are several aspects of this film that are creepy as Hell, but I guess the ignorance of children helps keep this cult classic going strong. My kids will watch it when old enough, I will be right there next to them, and my Wife will be nowhere to be found, because her parents did her a disservice as a child, by not introducing her to anything cool. Way to go R and K.

NBM rates Jim Henson's Labyrinth - Phenomenal

Buy It!!

 

Monday, March 28, 2011

Predators

After watching AVP a couple years back, I thought "There could be hope for this franchise." Then along comes Predators. A reboot of sorts produced by Robert Rodriguez, I knew it was gonna be good. There are a couple of things you can count on. Blood, good story and Danny Trejo. All 3 are delivered in great fashion. What I really enjoyed was how quickly it got going, as in before the opening credits even finish. Royce (Brody) is free falling unconscious when he wakes up and desperately tries to deploy his chute. It's terrifying until he hits the ground and is somewhat okay, then another body lands right next to him, and it's pretty funny. So, 7 Merchants of Death from different worldly circles are kidnapped by who knows and dropped in this jungle for God knows why. They are all dropped with an array of their own personal weapons. After not long at all, the 7 realize they must band together and figure out their purpose. They soon have to fight off some pretty creepy predator pets that somewhat resemble dogs. Once they survive that, they are on the move. Eventually they stumble into a camp Where a Predator is actually bound with chains, but alive. I'm guessing he banged one of the elder Predators wife or something.  The person on the team that is US military is a lady named Isabelle (Alice Braga). She knows of a story that involved creatures that resemble what she just saw. A pretty cool call back to the original film. The fight scenes are very cool and very intense. I especially liked when Hanzo used a katana to go sword to sword with one of the aliens. It's a good, fast movie that flows extremely well. Then, BAM, surprise. Larry Fishburne shows up. He plays a Gollum type character who was dropped there just like the other 7 several seasons earlier. He has figured out how to survive, and helps the crew. It's got a strange twist, but overall it's really decent. I really enjoyed it.

NBM rates Predators- Awesome





Sunday, March 27, 2011

Wall Steet - Money Never Sleeps

I never was a huge fan of the original, but that's probably because the age I was when I watched it. I did however have an urge to see the new one. Shia LaBeouf was a big part of that. I like the kid, and so far he has done no wrong--film wise anyway. The DUI was wrong. This film goes real time with the last film. It is set at a time when everything is soaring and Gordon Gekko is getting out of prison. Gekko's daughter who wants nothing to do with him, is going to marry a big wall street player Jake (LaBeouf). He is ambitious and smart. He is always after the next big score and then everything changes. His mentor and boss dies shortly after selling his independent investment firm for pennies on the dollar. Josh Brolin plays the shark/snake responsible for the firms demise. He forced Lou (Firm owner) into a no win situation and Jake (Shia) wants his revenge. He also wants to know the legend that is Gekko. Behinds his girls back he goes to a speaking event Gekko is having and later introduces himself as the man that's gonna marry his daughter. He is trying to use Gekko, while Gekko is gonna try and use him to get his daughter back. It is also set at the beginning of the collapse of the market, as much as I can't stand Oliver Stone for both his political movies and the movies themselves, he did this one right. He didn't try and shine the turd that is Wall st. And the mess they put this country in. He seemed to tell an honest story without holding back. The characters are fun to watch. The story behind the story is pretty good, and Charlie Sheen made a nice little cameo (Winning!). Michael Douglas is solid as always, and his non emotion take on Gekko is outstanding. Shia's performance solidifies that I feel he is the brightest young star in Hollywood. He has an awesome future ahead of him, so long as he doesn't pull a James Dean. He absolutely went toe to toe with Michael Douglas, and actually stole every scene they did together.


NBM rates Wall Street - Money Never Sleeps - Awesome


Buy It.
  

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Robin Hood (2010)

"On my signal, Unleash Hell." Sorry, wrong Crowe/Scott period film. So this film pretty much got crapped on at the box office and message boards, so I had to watch it. I read that the original script was titled Nottingham, and was gonna be about the hierarchy and tyranny of the town. That sounded way cooler than another identical Robin Hood film. Bad promotion and NO word of mouth is why this failed. When you have Ridley Scott, Russell Crowe, and Cate Blanchett attached, it should be golden. Once I was about 35 minutes into it, I felt it could go either way. The story was way different than the other versions. Good different, not stupid different. Although with a 2 hour 20 min run time, I felt it had better pick up or give us something. It did. So the Robin Hood we all know was a rich boy who stole and gave to stick it to the man. This version is actually more about identity theft than anything. When Sir Robin of Locksley is killed, Robin Longstride (Crowe) assumes his identity to get wealth and be safe from battle. Sir Robin should've had Lifelock. None of this would've happened with Lifelock. When Longstride returns to tell the Sir Robin's Father, played by the awesome Max von Sydow, of his son's passing, the charade begins. However, there are bigger problems ahead. With King Richard dead (good, new story line) his moron brother John takes over as King. With his new power he fires his Brother's and Father's right hand man, Marshal (William Hurt), and puts Godfrey (Mark Strong) in charge. He does not know, however, that Godfrey is working with France to overthrow England. All in all, the story is surprisingly good, great even. The deeper it went, the better it got. It really is about the uniting of England's power to not fall to France. The action is great. Great action can only be made possible through great direction. The angles of the scenes and choreography are seemless. I did joke that when this was coming out that I had already seen Gladiator. You gotta admit, it looks similar. Russell Crowe even rides a horse through battle and one of his men toss him his sword in full stride. I don't know if one can technically knock off someone's work if the other person is the same person then and now. Conundrum? This is a complete 180 from Prince of Thieves, which I love, but equally enjoyable. I was more than pleasantly surprised when it was all said and done. What I am sad about, is this was obviously the first of at least 2 Robin films with this cast, but poor ticket sales may have sunk those dreams. After seeing what this one was, I would definitely see a sequel.


NBM rates Robin Hood (2010) - Awesome (for now anyway)


Buy It

Friday, March 25, 2011

Enemy at the Gates

YES, YES, YES! I watched this for the first time last night. I have been pushed in every way, short of being tied down to watch this. I really had little desire to see it, but maybe that is because I really wasn't sure about the story behind the story. I was under the impression it was a WWII movie about stopping Adolf. Right and yet so wrong. The Nazi 3rd Reich is sweeping Europe and if they take Stalingrad, USSR, it's over. When Vassili Zaitsev (Law) is under the gun to save his own life, he shows what he has. Am eye for the kill. A sharpshooters eye and precision. He doesn't miss. Ever. He is not only able to save his own skin by killing 5 Nazi's with only 5 bullets. Impressive, Most Impressive. At least that's what Danilov (Fiennes) thinks. He begins by writing the story from a first hand perspective, to spread the word. He then convinces Kruschev that Vassili is the "Hope". He could get people to believe in the cause once again. Vassili then is put on Sniper assignment anywhere and everywhere Nazi's may be. Slowly and methodically he disposes of the small regimes until Hitler becomes a bit nervous. The Nazi's have no answers for this precise killer, so they bring back an old legend. Major Konig (Ed Harris) is their ace in the hole. He is a better shooter / assassin that Vassili. He is sent to hunt Vassili and this is when it gets intense. A little Ruski/Nazi version of Tom and Jerry. If it isn't crazy enough, a girl gets involved. Where there's a girl, there's trouble. Tania (The Lovely Rachel Weiss) has a bit of a thing for Vassili, while Danilov has a thing for her. When at war, men should not be at war with each other. Especially for a piece of A**, Hot A** sure, but nonetheless. I would think not dying would be the high priority, but whatevskis. (That is Russian for Eh.) This movie is funny to me, because we as movie watchers, Free American movie watchers, are rooting for a communist country to win. Lesser of the Evils, I guess, but a great story either way. This movie has everything. Love story, action, intensity, killing, and Bob Freakin Hoskins. I loved this movie, and being based on actual events, though Exaggerated, still very enjoyable. Watch it, enjoy it, and push it onto your friends. 

NBM rates Enemy at the Gates - Phenomenal

Buy It


Thursday, March 24, 2011

The Mist

Stephen King delivers again. He does a really good job of how he personifies himself. If you are only aware of his work "word of mouth" style, you are probably terrified of him. However, if you have seen every film that has been adapted, you know he is more of a thought provoking, thrilling, story teller. The Mist is just a reminder of his brilliance. It grabs us inside ten minutes, and never lets go until the very end. David (Tom Jane) lives in a nice town, he has a nice lake house, and a neighbor who portrays a reverse racism against him. He is always courteous to his neighbor Brent (Andre Braugher), but Mr. High and Mighty has this strange way of thinking everyone is out to get him. What really tips the scales is a big storm blowing through town destroys Brent's classic Mercedes, and somehow this must be Ol' Dave's fault...Probably because he is white. David has to go into town for some supplies essentially for the clean up. He and Brent and David's young son head to the store, and while inside a strange fog engulfs the whole outside parking area. The fog is dense and moist, almost Mist like. The patrons are pretty freaked out by this, so upon a bloody man slamming on the outside window, they decide to lock themselves in. Not knowing what is out there, they all have theories and discussions. God's wrath, The Government, Strange weather. You name, they argued about it. Then someone has the cojones to step outside through the loading dock. Something grabs him and kills him very quickly. This leads to the freak out. Now they know it is real, and deadly. Plan of attack? No idea. Play it by ear...fly by the seat of our pants. They cannot live at the store, so they have to brave the mist and hope for the best. They are being hunted by something they cannot see, and don't know how to fight. When the movie comes to a very bleak reality, actions must be taken. This film will make you think extremely hard about what you would do in the same situation. All I will say is, I would not have done that... Watch and you'll see. Oh, You're not afraid? You Will Be, You Will be.

NBM rates The Mist - Phenomenal

Buy It



Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Zombieland

I know when I think of Zombie comedies, I immediately travel to England and hang out at The Winchester Tavern. As much as I wanna discuss that one, I must wait until my year is almost up. So, I am gonna go with the second best movie from that genre. This movie had to be clever, due to the overwhelming success of SOTD. I doubt any movie will ever be as good as that, but Z-Land comes close. Every genre bending new film has to have a catch. Z-Land had a great catch. The rules. Columbus (Eisenberg) has invented these "rules to live by." The Double Tap, and limber up are my faves. So, once again the world has been taken over by Zombies and the few humans left must band together to survive. All the characters go by names of the city they grew up in. Tallahassee (Harrelson) is the first person he meets. He finds him peculiar, but he is a good guy to have your back. He loves killing him some zombies. They become a pretty good team, but every time Tallahassee tries to find twinkies, it gets a little uncomfortable. Eventually they run into two ladies that happen to be con artists. Wichita (Stone) and Little Rock (Breslin) steal their guns and car, but at least grand theft auto doesn't exist anymore anyway, so they get another car and head on their way. The girls are delusional about civilization existing out west, so that's where they head. The boys just kind of meander across the country trying to be awarded kill of the week, while surviving Z-Land. As much as these 4 people didn't need each other, they found something in each other that made the Earthly Zombpocolypse that much easily to handle. The best part of the entire film involves indoor golf, a vacuum cleaner, Ghostbusters music and Bill Freakin' Murray. As if I could like the guy anymore, I now do like him just the wee slightest bit more. I know if you like funny movies and you can handle seeing the creepiest of clowns the Z-Land is for you. Trust me, CREEPIEST CLOWN EVER!!!!!!!

NBM rates Zombieland - Phenomenal

Buy It!!


Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Road Trip

Tonight I will be indulging in a bowl of Ranch covered popcorn, a glass or 4 of SoCo, and the newest Todd Phillips movie to hit DVD, Due Date. This has made me want to go back to 1999 with his first offering Road Trip. I saw this movie 4 times and in two different states. It was a comedy unlike any we had seen before. It is clever, funny, and it has Amy Smart lowering her standards for every male audience member with a little gratuitous nudity. This is really a movie about Wuv, trew wuv. Josh and Tiffany have been in a serious relationship with each other for most of their lives. When they go off to different colleges, things go off the rails. Josh talks to her every night and when she blows him off a couple days in a row, he decides to hit the auction block, well, as a bidder anyway. His best friend is E.L. (Stifler) gives him some not so sound advice, but it does seem to be what's best for his buddy. Get out there and enjoy the limitless sex college has to offer. He has his eyes on Beth (Smart). She reciprocates and they have a night of passion. Then the unthinkable happens. The video tape of his collegiate conquest gets mixed up with a stupid guitar performance he made for his long distance girlfriend. The sex tape gets put in the mail and the Road Trip begins. He has to get to Austin, Massachusetts in three days or she will get the tape. So they are off in a piece o crap Taurus, on their way to Boston, Texas. They have several stops on the way. An all black frat house, a sperm donor bank, Barry Manilow's (Tom Green) grandparents, a diner with outstanding service and the best french toast in the land, and a short cut that takes a Dukes of Hazzard turn, then an absolute turn for the worse. EXPLOSION!! As if it couldn't get any worse for our hero to be, he has an exam in Philosophy that he may miss, which in turn, will cause him to fail out of school. The jokes, nudity, and crude humor doesn't get any better. All this is, is a race against the clock to save feelings, mostly. Tom Green is perfect in his role as College Tour Guide, ultimate slacker, and the man of wisdom on campus. He is responsible for several nude scenes. I love this movie in every sense. Plus, it really makes you wanna take a road trip with your favorite allies, and possibly steal a short bus from a blind woman who looks a lot like Chloe. I bet when he boss came back and saw the bus missing he said, "Dammit Chloe!"

NBM rates Road Trip - Phenomenal
Buy It

Monday, March 21, 2011

Rambo

Between Stallone's rebirth of Rocky and Rambo nearly at the same time, I was not at all eager to delve into another extension of a franchise that had long been put to bed. Whoa, whoa , whoa! Man, I love being wrong. As with all and anything actually printed on film, I would eventually watch them. I watched Rocky before Rambo, but I enjoyed Rambo waaaayyy more. I will be the first to admit that Stallone can do very little wrong. I have always loved him, even Stop! o m m w shoot, but he is really known for two specific franchises. John Rambo was created among the mid eighties "manly action movies". He had 3 great Rambo films, then he took a 20 year break, discovered steroids, and then came back for another installment. This time around, we find John Rambo living in Thailand doing work for the locals. Away from civilization, he keeps off the grid, and wants nothing to do with pointless killing ever again. Good thing it's a movie, because that decision is quickly over turned, and he actually kills loads of people. He is hired as a guide by Christian missionaries who want to make a difference in the war zone known as Burma. He denies them at first, but doesn't want these naive ignorant people to die. He gets them down river and turns from guide to protector, guardian angel if you will. He gets them in and they finally realize how bad they need to get back out. The way John finds ways to kill the bad little Burmans are awesome. It's very bloody and violent and perfect. Like I said. If you want a trip down nostalgia lane with John Rambo and a whole new story, this is definitely worth your time. I actually need to watch it again, but for now... "Live for Something, or Die for Nothing.", or is it "Live for Nothing, or Die for Something." Maybe it's actually "Life is not worth living without potato chips." I am horrible with movie quotes. I am pretty sure one of those lines were in the film.

NBM rates Rambo - Awesome

Buy It
  



Sunday, March 20, 2011

Paul

What's not to like? Nick Frost and Simon Pegg together again. With a new movie that they wrote. To say I was excited about seeing this would be an under statement. I was down right giddy. I was not alone. J, A-Bomb, and The Man of Steel also got in on some Paul. We made a nice little Saturday of it, and it paid off. Graeme (Pegg) and Clive (Frost) are sci-fi nerds to say the least. They play native Europeans, coming to America to road trip the most famous sightings sights. So, basically this movie has several things going for it right away. Nick and Simon, Science Fiction plot, loads of foul language that doesn't even make sense, and a slacker alien named Paul (voiced by Seth Rogen). The references to other movies during this one are astounding. One after another, they just keep coming. I am curious of how many references made it under my radar. Either they were so underground, or I was laughing while they said it. Paul is the infamous Alien that crashed in New Mexico 1947. The government has been keeping him in a nice facility where they constantly use his knowledge to learn. Then they feel he has served his purpose, so after being in the USA for 60 years, Paul now needs to get home. He escapes and is being tracked by super cop Agent Zoyle (Bateman) who will not be stopped until Paul is detained. Unfortunately for him, Paul meets Clive and Graeme who help him on his journey. The jokes are what make this movie awesome, but the special effects of Paul are insanely good. You don't even think of him as not real after a short while. The movie is funny, but when Kristen Wiig enters as Ruth it not only goes off the chain, it disintegrates the chain. She is a Jesus Freak, Bible thumper, whatever you call them, you know what I'm saying. She plays it perfectly, and when her beliefs are tested, she turns the movie in a whole new direction. I wanted to stay in my seat for the next showing to be able to catch all the jokes I may have missed. The Comic Con convention scenes are brilliant. Jeffrey Tambor shows up along with another very special surprise. I love that these guys plays the nerds so well. Deep down, aren't we all a lot like them in some ways? I will buy it the day it comes out on DVD, and much like Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, it will be watched at least 5 times inside the first week. I do think it was more clever than Hot Fuzz, but Shaun launched an entire new genre of ilm that Paul isn't going to do. I don't feel slacker alien films will be released by the dozens in 2012 or anytime for that matter. It is so special, and I dare ya to try and keep track of all the movie quotes and references they use. It's awesome.

NBM rates Paul - Phenomenal
**I'm sure it will be upgraded after another dozen views.


Saturday, March 19, 2011

Despicable Me

I must admit, tonight I am running short on time, so I am doing a movie that is so easy to write about, quote about, and talk about, it's gonna be easy. I bought this for $8 thinking it would at least be worth that. I have never watched it without my noisy kids. Today counts the 35 time I have watched it, and it is always good, always hilarious, and I catch little tid bits each time. Gru is a super villain voiced by Steve Carell who does a superb job. He uses a strange accent, but it works so well. When an Egyptian pyramid is stolen, he knows he needs to raise the bar. He wants to do so by stealing the moon. He steals a shrink ray, then another Villain named Vector (Jason Segal) steals it from him. He must get it back in order for his plan to work, but Vector's compound is so heavily guarded with gadgets, he has no way in. Vector even has a shark. Then Gru finds Vector's weakness...cookies. He buys several boxes from some orphan girls, then Gru gets an idea. He adopts these little monsters to help him infiltrate the premises. He is now in for something he could not possibly have expected. His right hand man is his gadget maker, Dr. Nefario (Russell Brand who also is brilliant.) He has a big issue with Gru's new family, but as soon as he gets his shrink ray back, he will send the girls back. Unfortunately they grow on him, and his attention is taken from his duties as super villain. This movie is so brilliant, but the real reason we keep laughing are the minions. Gru has hundreds of them and he knows all their names. Larry, Stuart, Jerry, Paul, Billy and so on. They are the funniest things I have ever seen in any animated film. This movie has so many one liners and they never get old. Gru must choose between Fatherhood and Villain, but he has a tough time differentiating the two. How will Gru deal with all his life decisions? The big surprise to me was the movie was made by Universal. I figured it was Dreamworks. If Universal can put out another couple of cartoons that are this brilliant, they could be real contenders to dominate the animated market. If you have kids, buy this movie. If you like cartoons, and you like to laugh, buy this movie. Otherwise, at least rent it and watch it once, but I can promise you that one time won't be enough.

**We are going to see "Paul" tonight, so tune in tomorrow for that review!!

NBM rates Despicable Me - Phenomenal

Buy It!!!

 

Friday, March 18, 2011

Pistol: The Birth of a Legend

With March Madness underway I am excited. Definitely my favorite sporting event. Superbowl lasts 1 night, The madness last a month. It basketball overload. The only other event that last as long are The Olympic, but we have to wait every four years for that. Pistol Pete was my idol growing up, but only after having watched this bio pic. Maravich revolutionized the game of basketball in ways that would've eventually happened, but he did it by 1959, when he was in the eighth grade. My dad rented this movie for us in 1991 when it came out, but after seeing it one time we had to own it. Back then Best Buy did not exist and new VHS tapes were $90. Somehow he got us a copy, and we wore that thing out. I may still have it somewhere, but now it is on DVD, so I will own it once again. This movie follows that particular year of his life. He was 5 foot nothin' a hundred and nothin', and the high school coach did not like his "circus act" style of play. His Dad was coaching Clemson at the time, and he taught Pete everything he knew. How he could change the game. Press (his Father) had ideals most could not fathom. It all starts by Pete skipping class, only to go to the gym at school (Dumb) and have a shoot around. The head coach catches him, scolds him, and sends him on his way. Pistol thinks he is dead, but the coach asks him to suit up for Varsity, which is unheard of back then and even today. He does have several obstacles in front of him, but the worst is the Coach's son Buddy. This is his team and he doesn't like this punk kid getting any attention. Pete sits on the bench for all of every game until he finally gets a chance. For him, this was it. He did what he needed to, but when it came down to the end he made a pass no one had ever seen, not even the intended target. The pass broke his nose, and he was scolded and benched yet again. Eventually he gets a better shot. Walt (Buddy's BFF) punches a guy in the gut for boxing him out and he is ejected, so Maravich went in. That was one of the funniest scenes in the movie. He ended up scoring on every shot he threw up, and was quickly dubbed Pistol Pete because he shot from his hip much like a gunfighter would draw his pistol. I really like this movie, because we all know who he is and what he did in his college and pro career. It's not that big of an underdog story, but it's fun to see him at that age, and if it's accurate, he was pretty dang good. It always inspired me as a ball player. I even wore his number throughout my career. I wore #23 because of Pete, not Jordan. I actually think Jordan wore it for the same reason. Just a thought. I'm gonna post some of my pictures at the bottom for all ya'll to enjoy. Check out the hair, and the Air Jordans.


Click Pics to Enlarge
 

NBM rates Pistol: The Birth of a Legend - Phenomenal

Buy It



Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Fugitive

A-Bomb posed a good question today. You know what movie you should review tonight for St. Paddy's day? What? Leprechaun. After all it has your girl in it. Jennifer Aniston is the hottest lady on Earth, but I have only seen this movie one time when I was 12, so it would be a little difficult. He then said, or you could do The Fugitive, it took place around this time. **Light Bulb** The Fugitive is a great film I was Lucky enough to see in the theater, and to this day, I still love it. There is actually a scene in Chicago on March 17, where one Marshal explains to the other how they dye the river green, and Dr. Richard Kimble (Ford) marches in the parade to evade the same Marshals. This is one of the better TV to Film crossovers ever made. Dr Kimble is accused of his wife's murder, when all he claims is, "It was a man, he had one arm." No one believes him, and he is convicted and sentenced to life in prison. A great action scene involving the prison transport bus crashing is awesome. Very intense. He escapes and is now on the run. He is too smart just to lay low. He wants to catch the killer and clear his name. Unfortunately for him, Samuel Gerard (Jones) is on the case. He is the best, and he doesn't bargain. He and his U.S. Marshals take over control and he will get his man. He is hard core, but he also is so good at what he does, he knows things are not always what they seem. The jump off the dam was awesome, but it gave us a great line from Gerard. Local cop - "Come on, the guy is fish food" Gerard - "Okay, go get a cane pole and catch the fish that ate him." As Kimble strives forward the pieces begin to fit and the suspense thickens. An intense film where the audience knows what happened. No twists or turns. We do stay on the edge, waiting to see if Kimble can succeed before Gerard catches up to him. Tommy Lee Jones never fails to give the best performance he can. This movie is brilliant the way it all comes together and it is a nice piece of directing. The film is based in Chicago and that gives us the opportunity to hear what an elevated train sounds like. Another comedic scene. Happy St. Paddy's and I hope you will all join me for Guinness tonight... In spirit that is, I don't want all of you in my house.
**The Sequel titled U.S. Marshals is surprisingly good, even to the point I would say "equally" good.

NBM rates The Fugitive - Phenomenal

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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

Where did you get that grenade? I DON'T KNOW.
When I think of Ron Burgundy there is only one way to describe it to you. Let's give it a try. Skyrockets in Flight, Afternoon Delight. Probably the most quotable movie of all time. Seems to me Will Ferrell made this film after he got a little bit of Hollywood clout. It also helped launch the career of Steve Carell as the new funny man on the scene.... and Michael Scott was born. Set in the 1970's, Anchormen were highly regarded as celebrities, and none was any bigger than my man, Ron Burgundy (Ferrell). His compradres on channel 4 news in San Diego are Champ (Koechner), Brian Fantana (Rudd), and Brick (Carell). These guys are his life blood. What happens next is horrible. Veronica Corningstone, as in, HE'S GONNA PUT CORNINGSTONE ON!!!!!! She is the new Co- Anchor and Ron doesn't like it one bit. He does his best to show her who's boss, unfortunately, he has burned every bridge in the office, well, vaginal bridge that is. The ladies of the office want her to succeed, but he has different plans. He wants to be on her. Veronica is not from around there so she is not aware that Ron is kind of a big deal. Basically Ron is on top of his world, then has to share the mountain top, then he comes tumbling down only to rise back up and stick it in Wes Mantooth, and his mother Dorothy, who apparently was a saint. The ultimate prize is to have the #1 news ratings. This competition brings lots of cameos and one of the most brilliant no holds barred brawl in the history of EVER. Tim Robbins shows up as Public news anchor. Luke Wilson is another local anchor, but when Ben Stiller shows up as Arturo Mendes - Spanish Language news it's on like Donkey Kong. He has a whip and everything. Never have I seen a man be killed with a trident in such glorious fashion. Thanks Brick. Jack Black has a motorcycle accident, by the most bizarre way possible. I think it was beans and cheese. Baxter takes the brunt of his anger. If you really ponder how big of a hit this film really was, its mind boggling. Under the impression that it would be lucky to break even, the studio was happy, but an $84 million box office total. It was a bit of an enigma to everyone. Luckily it did do so well. Without Anchorman, we may never have gotten Talladega Nights, Stepbrothers, Blades of Glory, Semi Pro, or The Other Guys, and for that we thank you. Dean-O and I just went through a half hour Anchorman quote off and I don't want it to stop there. Leave your Favorite quote in the comment box at the bottom of this post. As for NBM, you stay classy A Whale's vagina.

Dean-O - I'm gonna punch you in the ovaries. Right in the baby maker.

Jester - It's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.

Leave your Quote for all to see:

NBM rates Anchorman : The Legend of Ron Burgundy - A Work of Art

Buy It or the rivers will run red with Burgundy's blood!!
 


Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Population 436

I don't think this was released in theaters, so I don't expect any of you to have heard of it. I either saw it on IFC or HBO, but right away I was intrigued. Good story line just waiting to be unraveled. At first I thought it was gonna be like Wicker Man, but I liked this so much more. It was also the first time I ever saw Fred Durst (Yep, of Limp Biscuit fame) on screen in a real movie. Guess what, Dude can act. He is so good, you completely forget he is a real life Douche. Anyway, this film follows a peculiar happening that has been constant for a century. The population has never risen or fallen from 436. Jeremy Sisto plays a census taker, and he is assigned to this town called Rockwell Falls. Once there, after shaking hands and being very welcomed he Census something is not right. TeHehe (Get it? Senses. Oh Jog on you wankers.) He gets an eerie feeling, but decides to finish his job. What lies ahead has even him baffled and he won't stay any longer. Wah Wah Wah. He can't leave. It is beyond his power. This is when it becomes frightening clear. The population stays at 436 because.....

**I know this is easily my shortest review, but I wanna be clear, I have not been drinking, It is only 8 pm, and I have a clear head. I just don't wanna ruin a movie no one has seen. Plus I am about to watch The Fighter and see if Dean-O knows what the hell he is talking about.



NBM rates Population 436 - Awesome

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Monday, March 14, 2011

Firefox

I must admit to all of you that my love for movies is directly derived from my Mother. ==============>
She loves movies and will watch about anything (Sound Familiar?), but every once in a blue moon I see a movie that should not have been kept from me. She was always good about previewing them first, then introducing us to them, to which we would watch them repeatedly. So last night I made at least one grown man jealous, and surprisingly enough, it wasn't because I have gorgeous, bouncy hair. It was because I got to see Firefox for my very first time. It is one of those films that once you see it, you do always remember the first time, and each time after that, it's just not got that 'First Time' feel. The awe it inspired. The thoughts racing through my brain. I wish I had seen the film as a child. Maybe if I had, I would've gone to college. It's that life changing. All I was told was it was a film where Eastwood steals a Russian plane and flys it back to America. What I came to realize is the depth of the film is so much more. It's actually a brilliant espionage flick that, to our surprise, was Directed by Eastwood himself. So, the plane is called Firefox, or Mig31. It is the first of its kind. It can out maneuver any other plane or aircraft for that matter, cannot be seen on radar, and the helmet is hooked into a central computer and it reads the brainwaves for commands from its pilot. Brilliant concept for 1982. The first half of this surprising long 2 hour 16 minute movie is about getting Mitchell Gant (Eastwood) into Russia and keeping him safe. A lot of others that set out to help him made the ultimate sacrifice. Even after he seems to survive 3 identity changes and constantly verifying his papers to the KG-usedto-B, he is close to getting near the bird. Once he gets the plane off the ground, an entirely new movie starts. An action packed thrill ride where he really gets to know what the Firefox can do. The Ruskies are absolutely not going to let him retain possession of the new creation. They try and take it over, and if that doesn't work they plan on cutting their losses and just decide to blow the damn thing up. Unfortunately they have no idea what Mitchell is capable of behind the wheel. Does that phrase even make sense when talking about an aircraft. Wheel? Whatever. I loved this film and probably will watch it again in the next month or so. After all, I have 29 years worth of catching up to do. Thanks Mom, Love ya.

NBM rates Firefox - Phenomenal

Buy It!!!
 

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Legion

I gotta say I was not expecting what I got with Legion. I can vividly remember reading about it during pre production as it was being hailed as the next big thing. When the first stills were released it shut down the message boards, and I still had no idea what it was even going to be about. Then I began getting tid bits of info and finally the first trailer was released and I remember being like, eh. When it finally did come out, it got ripped to pieces by everyone, so I was all the more weary of wasting my time. Then I started this site and wanted to make a point to watch it to see if it was really as bad as they all said. Back burner was getting full with films I "needed" to watch and then it happened. A-Bomb accidentally started watching it and couldn't stop. He didn't so much Urge me to see it, but more or less nudged me to. I finally had a wife free afternoon the other day and so it began. Within the first 15 minutes I was interested. Then the plot thickened and I was curious as to how it could go on like this for another hour. The writers did a fantastic job of human development and different story lines. Having been raised in a Baptist home, and educated in the finest private schools, I consider myself very well versed with the Christian faith and the Bible itself. The NIV version that is, King James is just confusing. Legion got me more interested by the fact that the Devil was not involved in it at all. God is a lot of things and he can also be very much full of wrath. He destroyed mankind once before with the flood. He rid the Earth of the wicked and started over with Noah and his family. Legion is God's vengeance against the wicked and he sends his Angels to begin the destruction. Michael (Paul Bettany) is a General in God's army, but he does not follow this order. He still has faith in mankind. So many movies follow Faith in a higher power, but to turn it around and show a higher power have faith in us. It's pretty remarkable. He comes to Earth, cuts off his wings, and helps the humans fight the incoming Angel Militia. He ends up in a small town diner protecting an unborn child. If the child can be born, he feels he will have won. The war comes to a head when God's other commanding officer, Gabriel, shows up to get rid of Michael and the child, along with anyone else who gets in the way. Like I said, there are so many movies about the end of the world, but God is rarely the bad guy. I love the direction this film took, and I must say I couldn't have written a better ending. God is Love, Mercy, and Forgiveness above all else. I did not expect such a powerful film, but I appreciated every last second of it. It is rated R for language and some creepy scenes featuring Angels in human form. They are unrestricted by mans laws to say the least.

NBM rates Legion - Phenomenal

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Saturday, March 12, 2011

Jackass 3

Being a semi-fan of what the Jackass guys represent, and having seen the other feature length films and most, if not all the TV episodes, I could not wait for the 3rd installment. I knew I would see it and enjoy it in all it's glory, but when Stephen King placed it in his Top 10 of 2010 list, I had to know why. Last night I found out why. Inside of 15 minutes I was laughing to tears, and it didn't stop there. I have never laughed so hard for so many consecutive minutes in my whole life. The bit were clever, with the occasional "filler" bit that is to be expected. Having seen the other two.5 films, this one rises head and shoulders above those with originality and disturbing visuals along with excellent ingenuity. Even now, 21 hours after we finished it, we are still talking about the bits and which ones made us laugh the hardest. It is hard to believe these adults would do this self imposed abuse on their bodies. I mean, my knees crack and pop just going up stairs. I don't need a buffalo to run me over, or a ram to ram me repeatedly. If A.P. could stay through the entirety with her "sympathetic puking disorder", and only leave the room a few times, anyone could make it. I will own it and LMAO again and again. One of my favorite gags is pictured above. It's also the only one I would ever consider doing. The jet stream scene is so classic when they toss a football in the flow and watch it disappear down the field instantly. Most scenes are hilarious, but there are 3 or 4 bits that are downright disgusting. If these 3 words don't get you thinking you need to see this, than I am not doing my job...."Lamborghini Tooth Pull."

NBM rates Jackass 3 - A Work of Art (I dare you to watch and disagree) **This dare goes out to Men only, Women would easily hate it and not be lying.

Buy It!!

Friday, March 11, 2011

The Girlfriend Experience

Ever since this movie was released I had an interest. A little because of how independent it is, or because Steven Soderbergh directed, but mostly because of the precedent it was about to set. Not the film, but the lead actress. Sasha Grey, the porn star, is about to jump mainstream, and everyone including myself was curious to see how she would perform. Can she act, or did she get the role based on the nature of the film. You would obviously want someone comfortable with nudity and money for sex, so a porn star seems about right. I don't expect Soderbergh to sell himself short, and his was his decision to make. He did well. Not so much he, but her. Sasha is magnificent. It is always rolling in the back of my mind that this is her shot to graduate in the "industry", and wondering if she will. After seeing that she can actually act, I don't doubt she could be a star. The big question is the "Indie" vs "Studio" dynamic. Indie's can do what they want, but will a studio ever give her a shot, knowing she is an easy tabloid target due to her career. If she is put in a big role, and it tanks, the finger will be pointed at her. The Girlfriend Experience is exactly that. Chelsea (Grey) is a high priced classy escort. Not the yellow pages type, but the little black book of high rollers type who want more than 20 minutes. She gives these men much more than a roll in the hay. She listens to them, attends parties and functions with them, and basically plays girlfriend for a night or weekend. She has a steady customer list, and she appreciates her regulars. She has her rules, but her life isn't easy. She has an actual boyfriend that seems ok with her profession, but tensions flair at times. She wants to go to the next level of escortism, but doesn't want to pay the price, which basically means sleeping with the scum of the Internet message boards for a positive review. She obviously doesn't know about NBM where bribes and favors are unnecessary to get a good review. This may be the most "indie" feeling film I have ever watched, and at a run time of only 1 hour 18 minutes it is short. It has several time killer scenes of street musicians that have no bearing on the plot. The only thing it adds are minutes to the run time. I don't know anyone who would appreciate this film for what it is. My wife hated it. Not because of the content, because she doesn't appreciate art films. A-Bomb and A.P. would hate it. To be honest, I really can't think of anyone. This is my review and you can take it as you will. This is the most adult themed film I have reviewed. It feels very much like a documentary at times. Although it is extremely graphic (language) it contains little to no nudity and is absolutely not soft core. I really think Sasha has taken her shot and done well with it. She did have a stint on Entourage this past season, so it may be a start of things to come.

NBM rates The Girlfriend Experience - Awesome

Buy It


Thursday, March 10, 2011

The Box

Rated one of the worst films of 2009, I can kinda see why. Wait, wait, wait.... Now I'm gonna get into why it's worth watching. This is one of the rare cases where, once again the critics and viewers are on opposite sides. Not the usual opposite sides. RT critics rate it a full 18% higher than users. I know why....let me tell you, so you don't have to think about it. Adapted for the screen from a short story (I'm guessing extremely short...Yes Hatcher, it could've began and ended in 9 minutes, since I know you were wondering) by Richard Kelly. He gets loads of slack due to Donnie Darko, but honestly that is his only film with real awesome substance. He did do Southland Tales, which I want to understand so badly, but it seems nearly impossible...even for me. Anywho, back to The Box. Press the button : get a million bucks. The catch : someone you have never met will die the instant the button is pressed. Interesting concept. It's based on human greed + guilt. It is obviously a film that was written backwards. The ending was written and is quite brilliant, but filling in the preceding (D) 90 minutes proved difficult for the cohesiveness (D) of it all. The flow is a bit of a conundrum (D) to me. It absolutely got me hooked with the first 30 minutes. Hmmmm, $1million vs. a strangers life. That's a toughie. What they don't think about are the consequences. Oh yeah, and it's 1976, so $1million dollars is actually a lot of money. The middle half hour is confusing and I'm not sure if I would've made it through if my Mother hadn't told me that she enjoyed the twist. Twist - I swear, that word is the bane of my existence sometimes. I am glad I finished it though. I enjoyed "the choice". I also enjoyed how women are portrayed as greedy little "you know whats". It's a think piece.

(D) Vocabulary specifically selected for Dean-O and his Verbose-ness.

**On a side note, I wanna send out congratulations to Hatcher for his first NBM mention. You are now officially "somebody". Way to go big guy.

NBM rates The Beginning and End - Awesome
  and the Middle Neutral and Confusing

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Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Morning Glory

I actually wasn't going to watch this film, but due to circumstances out of my control, I ended up being home with nothing else better to watch, so why not. As you can see, I pulled this weeks quote ==> from it, because I literally laughed out loud. I think it was pitched to us as a Rom-Com, but once again it was so much more than that. It was a human dramedy of sorts, with some love interests, but not many. It stars 3 people I absolutely love Diane Keaton, Rachel McAdams and Dr. Jones. Becky (McAdams) is a TV show producer who has been kicked to the curb. She is given a second and last chance by Jerry (Goldblum) who is in charge of an early morning show with crap ratings. She is put in charge of this show with one host, Colleen (Keaton), but she needs the flame to ignite the media bomb. She goes after a former network big shot anchor, Mike Pomeroy (Ford) who was canned from prime time news journalism and has been still collecting his ridiculous salary until his contract expires. When Becky comes to bring him back to TV, he is less than thrilled and absolutely impossible to please, but if he doesn't accept a job offered to him, his contract and salary will be null and void. He does not make it easy on anyone. He is not only kind of a prick, he's a total prick. Mike and Colleen (Miss Arizona 1970 - something) really can't stand each other which makes for hilarious banter. It's like Anchorman, but we know we are not watching an asinine but brilliant comedy, so we really think about it as if it were real. Becky has worked hard, but cancellation is inevitable (Mr. Smith Voice). She then begins making her lame morning show quirky, intense, and fun. What the hell, right? We are all going down anyway. She does the impossible and creates a hit, but Mike is still hating life. Her next goal is to "reach" him, but that may not happen. This is actually quite a good movie with very little fluff and time wasting scenes. It is quick and fun. It's a good pre cursor to Ford getting back to his roots as an action star in the upcoming "Cowboys and Aliens" (see sidebar). It was a pleasant movie to watch on a Tuesday night and I think everyone could find something to like about it.

NBM rates Morning Glory - Awesome

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